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Chapter 18

Chapter 18 Disconnected 

Starting now, i'm going to dedicate the chapter to the first comment. (: 

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Zayn left awhile ago, obeying Alexa's pleas for him to leave her alone. 

Alexa lay on the cold hardwood floor, her body shaking violently with her sobs. 

When in a bad situation, think 'Things can ony get worse'

Alexa clenched her mouth shut, trying to make her constant cries silent. 

Once you think you hit rock bottom, think 'Things can only get better'

Those words replayed in her mind over and over. Alexa's mum repeated those words to her every night before the fatal accident. 

Alexa's mind drifted off to the reason she was crying. 

Harry. 

Why would he say that? Alexa thought. The sobs that racked her body stopped momentarily, leaving silent tears to stream down her cheeks. 

Alexa didn't want to know what kind of excuse he would come up with. It would probably be as stupid as he was. 

Why would he tell a billion people she was bulimic? All morning she had received death threats. She had deleted her account on every social networking site she was on. Twitter, Facebook, everything. 

The only thing Alexa wanted more than anything in the world was her mother's warm embrace, her comforting words, her scent, anything that represented her mother, she wanted. It's been six years without her mum, and Alexa was on the brink of going insane. 

The boys were her family, but Alexa felt as if she was more of a burden on them than a friend. The boys didn't need a crybaby with them. She felt horrible for Olly even knowing her. She was a burden to them all; Eleanor, Danielle, Annabelle, everybody. 

Alexa got out of her fetal position and stuck her head out into the hallway, hoping the coast was clear. 

When he figured it was, she made her way for her and Harry's shared room, her feet making soft taps on the floor. 

She peaked into the room. No sign of Harry. 

Alexa quickly slipped into the room and gathered her suitcases, filling them with her clothes and valuables she had brought with her. 

Alexa walked downstairs with her luggage only to find that the whole house was empty. There was a note on the counter. 

Went out to breakfast. Didn't want to disturb you. You needed the sleep. 

-Z

Alexa snorted. She wasn't sleeping. She was weeping. Her life was shit as of right now. 

Alexa got out a sharpie and a piece of paper. 

Everyone, 

I'm sorry. Sorry for what i'm about to do. No, not suicide. Leaving. I don't need to burden your life anymore. Boys, you need to work on your music. Danielle, your dancing carrer, Eleanor, your modeling. Olly, your flawless singing. Annabelle, trying to get Niall to be yours. With me in your lives, those things would be impossible to reach official success. Harry, you were right. I am annoying. I am bulimic, and i'm not proud of it. I never dreamed of breaking up with you, I always thought you would be the one too, but I guess we need to say goodbye. Just forget about me. All of you. I've caused such a negative impact on your lives that it makes me sick to my stomach. I'm leaving and you're not going to find me. Not now, not ever. You can not contact me because I left my phone on Zayn's bedside table. I've been packed and my flight has been booked. I'm sorry, but this is goodbye. 

Thanks for the memories. I'll cherish them for the rest of my life. 

I'll miss you all. 

-Alexa 

Alexa couldn't help but let a few tears plop onto the paper, smudging some of the words. Alexa gathered her bags and walked out the door, heading to the nearest town to hail a taxi. 

I hope they find the video I left on my phone, She thought as she let a few stray tears tumble down her cheeks and onto the wet pavement. 

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The beachhouse was filled with laughter as everybody entered the house, coming back from breakfast. 

"I'm going to check on Alexa," Harry informed everybody, making his way to the stairs. 

"I don't think you'll need to," Liam whispered, taking the piece of paper into his now shaking hands. 

"She left."

Harry's head whipped over to Liam. 

Not true, Harry thought over and over again. 

Danielle dropped to her knees, tears forming in her eyes. 

"I'm sorry. Sorry for what i'm about to do. No, not suicide. Leaving," Louis read, his voice shaking with every word. 

Harry stood still in the doorway. 

"Harry, you were right. I am annoying. I am bulimic, and i'm not proud of it. I never dreamed of breaking up with you, I always thought you would be the one too, but I guess we need to say goodbye. Just forget about me," Niall's eyes scanned the paper. 

Harry's face emotionless, as if his face were carved out of stone. His face was blank, all blank but the tears slowly leaking from his now dull, green eyes. 

"I'm leaving and you're not going to find me. Not now, not ever. You can not contact me because I left my phone on Zayn's bedside table. I've been packed and my flight has been booked. I'm sorry, but this is goodbye," Eleanor read, her hand clamped around her mouth. 

Harry didn't know what to think. Instead, he just ran out the door and ontot he pavement, running torwards the figure in the distance. 

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"Alexa!" Harry panted. 

"Fuck off, Harry," she said, no emotion in her voice. She didn't even turn around to look at him. 

"Never," he said. 

Alexa stopped walking as Harry stood in her way. His hands cupped her face as he smashed his lips onto hers, putting all the passion in his body into that kiss.

It was all a waste. 

Alexa didn't move. She didn't kiss him back, she just stared at him. 

Harry pulled away and stood on the side of her. She resumed walking. 

"Did you feel anything?" Harry cried, dropping to his knees. 

"Nothing."

She kept walking, leaving Harry behind. Leaving everyone and everything behind. 

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As Alexa settled herself into the uncomfortable plane seat, she moved her gaze to the window. 

'Please Buckle Your Seatbelts. We will be arriving in Leeds very shortly.' 

Alexa layed her head on the window. She thought back to the scene with Harry. 

"Did you feel anything?" 

She replayed his voice in her mind. 

"Nothing," She replied. 

But that was a lie. 

She felt everything in that kiss. 

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