I Hate That I Love You//Syatt Fan Fiction

//chapter eighteen//

NERVOUS BREAKDOWN WARNING

Sophia's p.o.v

I shot up really quickly from my sleep. I felt very extremely nervous for some reason. I felt like not coming out of my trailer or answering the door. My heart was pounding, ringing started loudly in my ears, my mind started yelling at me calling me worthless, I started to get dizzy and I had a bad headache. I could barely see but I  went to look in the mirror and my vision seen just enough to see that my eyes were blood shot. I didn't know what the hell was wrong with me. It was like everything was spinning. I picked up one of my research books that was about mental stable health and nerves.

I read the chapter about nervous break downs. Everything it said was how I am right now. Then it all came back to me. I use to have these all the time when I was bullied by Wyatt and them. They gave me mg social anxiety but I didn't want to tell them. I lock my door and put my knees up to me and rock back and forth. I didn't care if we had to shoot the film today. I then heard a knock on my door. The knock turned into pounding. It seemed like more than one person. Than I heard them yelling. It was Wyatt, Finn, and Jack.

My mind was scaring me. I keep having visuals of how I would look dead and how people would just laugh. The door got broke down. “You guys are paying for a new door.” I laughed while crying. Obviously I was mentally snapping because my emotions were flying faster than a bird on lsd. Wyatt and them instantly jolted up to me and was about to hug me but I backed away. “Please don't go near me right now.” I said shaking. “Sophia what's wrong!?” They all asked in unison slowly walking towards me as I slowly walked backwards away from them. “I haven't had one of these in so long.” I cried out. “One of what!?” They asked in unison. “My....my violent nervous breakdowns that's all.” Right after I said that I collapsed. I was half there and half passed out. Before they could pick me up I stood back up still dizzy and tried to smile. I felt like someone who knew know one was falling for it but still tried to act okay anyways but I didn't care.

I was backing up until I reached a wall. “GO AWAY I WILL HANDLE THIS BY MYSELF!!!!” I yelled. “No Sophia!! We're not gonna let you do this!!” Wyatt yelled. They finally came up to me. Wyatt grabbed me and the rest ran to open the door while I was acting like an untamed cat trying to get out of his grip but he had his hand around my waist tight so I couldn't leave. We reached their trailer and he put me down but was still holding on to me. “Sophia why are you having a nervous breakdown!?” Wyatt asked demanding an answer. “I'm not gonna tell you!!” I yelled. “Tell me NOW!!!!” He yelled harshly. “FINE I GAINED SOCIAL ANXIETY AND NERVOUS BREAKDOWNS FROM ALL OF YOUR PAST BULLYINGS OKAY!! IS THAT WHAT YOU GUYS WANNA HEAR!? YEAH WHEN YOU GUYS STARTED BULLYING ME IN THE FIFTH GRADE I STARTED FEELING SELF DOUBT AND INSECURITY!!!!” The room went dead silent after I yelled that. He let go of me and now I had a rash because he had to keep a strong hold on me or I would unleash like hell on earth.

I calmed down finally and the ringing in my ears, blood shot eyes, loudness of my mind telling me I'm worthless, dizziness, headache, heart pounds, and blood boilingness all went away. I fell to the floor completely crying my eyes out from the rush that just happened and losing my strength to stand up because what just happened to me used all the strength in me to have a nervous breakdown. I was know in a slight pain.  I was laying with my face to the floor looking like a dead person but all I could do was cry. Wyatt picked me up because I was like a lifeless doll who was a feather since I had no strength. He looked mad. I thought he was gonna murder me with the fury in his eyes but no. He held me tight and was speechless at the seen. “Sorry..that won't happen again.” Was all I said and I ran out.

I heard a knock on my trailer door. “Go away!!” I yell. “Sorry as director I can't do that.” A voice who I know now is Andi spoke up. “Come in.” I said. “Kid why you so upset?” He asked taking a seat next to me. “I don't know it's just..The boys went from my enemies to my best friends so quickly and it all rushed so fast and so many things happened and my mind is just spinning.” I said upset. “Kid, stop worrying. We all love you now. We will always love you. Your like my little niece and your like their closest everything. Your a good kid Soph and no matter what you will always have us.” He said giving me a hug. “Thanks Mr.Director it's nice to talk to someone that actually knows what to say.” I smiled. “No problem now me and the boys have a movie to shoot but since your missing in the movie already then you can stay here and relax your mind.” He said then he walked out.

My mind started feeling better. I needed some real advice. Thankfully we have a wise director. I then just think about tomorrow and how that day will be and that how I was actually calm.

a/n: Lmao this story was all over the board. This was also short but I'm kinda busy—sorry that was a lame excuse. I'm never busy because I don't have a life. The reason why is because I'm gonna listen to music and plan St.Patrick's Day. Oh yeah if you guys didn't know, that's my favorite holiday because I freaking love Irish people!! Yeah so have a great day. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤