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"Hello! Did you know that you are a complete b*tch?"

"Excuse me?"

"..."

"Who am I talking to?"

"This is Gisele, who is this?"

"Why the f*ck do you sound like Siri?"

"I do not know what you are talking about."

"I'm very pissed right now so don't even give me that bullsh*t."

"What happened?"

"Someone messed with my contacts"

"Interesting. Do you know what else is interesting?"

"Wha-"

"There are about three pounds of bacteria living in your stomach."

"That's not interesting. That's just f*cking gro--"

"Congratulations on obtaining your fourth fact in a row. Please call again soon."

"God f*cking dam--"

*beep*

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