The Tale of the Brokenhearted

Chapter 16: Good Enough For Now

Alice's POV

I thought I knew exactly what would happen if Bella were to come home. I thought that we'd all rejoice and be happy that our Edward was no longer suffering. I thought that Bella would make the right decision, choose Edward, and all of our problems would be over, temporarily anyway.

I couldn't have been more wrong. Nothing had really changed; if anything, things were worse than ever. Bella had returned, and Edward was still suffering. The main reason for this was Miss Leah. I loved Leah just as much as I did Bella, at times more so. Leah knew how to cut through Edward's antsy, drama king persona, and she taught him to laugh and have fun. I knew that, at the very least, Esme and Carlisle were thankful to her for that. But now that Bella was back, we hadn't seen or heard from Leah for almost a week. In that time, I hadn't even heard Edward speak her name. I knew it wasn't because he wasn't thinking of her. On the night of Bella's return, Edward went out in search for Leah and when he came back his temperament was noticeably colder.

Since Bella's return Edward has taken her out a couple of times. I had hung out with her some, too, however, her indecision was really starting to annoy me. Edward's tactic of just sitting back and waiting for her to make her decision was even more annoying. I didn't know if I could've done that if I were in his shoes, be with someone that wasn't sure they were in love with me.

I took a deep breath and checked my makeup in the mirror, then looked beyond my reflection to see my delicious husband still lying in bed. He laid there on our navy blue sheets, shirtless, with one of his arms draped over his eyes. He took a deep breath and lifted his arm briefly so that he could peek at me. I met his eyes with a giggle and a wink. He patted the bed and motioned for me to lie with him. I took my place at his side and he wrapped him arm around my shoulder like he always did. I loved how Jasper did the simplest things that made me feel safe.

"This is one of those times that I wish for sleep," he murmured before he touched his lips to my hair.

"I know this tension has to be overwhelming for you." I was worried about him; all of the intense emotions he was absorbing had to be uncomfortable. I didn't want that for him. He was really still trying to get control of his own impulses and emotions regarding his thirst. I didn't want him suffering any more than necessary.

"It is, but it's nothing I can't handle. I'm actually a little intrigued. This reads a bit like a soap opera, don't you think?" A smirked played at his lips. All I could do is look at him in disbelief.

"Yeah it does." I gave the situation some thought. "I'm not sure who Edward is going to end up with." I wasn't even sure who I really wanted him to end up with.

"I think he's leaning toward no one at all. Something was done that really hurt his feelings… he feels mad. I can't tell you what or by whom, I'm not a mind reader. I just know that's how he's feeling. I feel his indifference at times, the hurt, and then anger. I don't know if he feels love for either of them anymore." I frowned; that couldn't be right.

"Maybe he's heartbroken over Bella and indifferent over Leah?" I guessed and Jasper shrugged his shoulders.

"I can't guess at this one, babe. Edward and Leah were starting to feel new things for each other. I don't think he would be indifferent; he doesn't seem like the type. I have no idea what's going on inside Edward's head."

Edward's POV

I needed to talk to Leah. It wasn't a want or a wish; I needed her to tell me that what I was thinking was wrong. When I went to the apartment to talk to Leah on the night of Bella's return, I saw that damned Ryan's car in the parking lot beside hers. I went up to her door and I heard two irregular heartbeats and I could view in Ryan's mind's eye what was happening. They were intertwined on Leah's couch. The same couch that I would sit on and run my fingers through her hair was she laid her head in my lap. He was pulling her into his lap and she was more than eager to oblige. I remembered the words that flowed through her head while she and Ryan were together; I don't want to think, I just want to feel.

I was so mad at her for being so impulsive and reckless. I'd left before anything x-rated happened. I decided that what I'd been feeling for Leah must have been just 'rebound' emotions; that we hadn't connected on the level that I'd thought we had, after all. We had just been using each other until something better came along. So I should have been fine, elated even, that Bella was back. Yet, even though I had tried spending parts of my empty days and nights with Bella, something felt off, or missing. I had grown tired of pretending that Ryan staying in Leah's place didn't bother me. I needed answers and she wasn't taking my calls.

So there I was, sitting in my car in front of the Hardware and Décor store where Leah worked. I was gripping my steering wheel, fighting the urge to go in and have this conversation in public. In a few minutes her shift would be over and I'd have my answers. I took a deep breath and I smelled the stench of Ryan, her replacement and possibly her lover. Within seconds his black Chevy Tahoe pulled into the space beside Leah's Honda. I clenched my jaw as I watched the jerk fall out of his truck and make his way into the store. I noticed that he was dressed a little better than I'd seen in the past. At least the sap was making an effort to man up for her. I glanced down at the clock; I literally had a minute before Leah's shift was over. I tapped my foot anxiously. I hadn't been this nervous to talk to Leah since the time she'd first called me out, while I was stalking her. It seemed we'd come full circle. I couldn't help but chuckle at the situation, as I was back to stalking because she wanted nothing to do with me, because maybe she'd found better.

After a few more minutes Leah came out of the store with Ryan quick on her heels. She was wearing her beautiful long ebony hair half up, while the rest flowed down her back. She was wearing one of the casual dresses that Alice had bought her. It was red and barely touched her knees. She had paired it with a black denim jacket and some black Eskimo boots. She put her hand into her pocket and dug out her keys. Ryan tugged on her jacket which caught her by surprise. He leaned in and attempted to kiss her and she backed away. In my head I did a happy dance, she'd backed away. She didn't want him! They were talking about something and then she glanced my way and frowned. He touched her cheek and she cupped her hand over his and shook her head. She slowly removed his hand from her face and squeezed his hand and offered him a sad smile. He pulled her into a brief hug and then went back inside.

Once Mr. Touchy-Feely went back inside, I got out of my car and strode cautiously over toward Leah. She gave no sign that she had noticed me me, she just walked straight to her car. Once she got to her car she unlocked her door.

"Say what you need to say, Edward. I want to go home." She murmured without turning around.

"I need your help, Leah. I don't know what to do." I blurted out. I'd surprised myself; this wasn't what I'd come here for. I wanted to know about Ryan and her.

"Help with what?" She rounded on me; she seemed really confused. "Please don't tell me this is about Bella, you wouldn't be that cruel."

"How would my asking for my friend's help be cruel?" I countered and she rolled her eyes at me.

"Don't play stupid!" She raised her voice and then attempted to calm herself. "I can't help you." She opened her door and sat down and focused her sad eyes on me. They mirrored the way I had felt inside since that night. "Not after what's happened. Don't ask me anything stupid like 'what am I feeling' because you damn well know. I don't have enough strength or energy to go through being like this again. I was doing my best to avoid this feeling and to avoid you." She started her car.

"Is that why you slept with Ryan? To avoid what you're feeling?" She looked puzzled and then remembered the kiss.

"I'm not a slut, Edward! Ryan and I aren't dating so we haven't had sex. I did kiss him, but that's none of your business." She tried to close her door but I blocked it.

"Did you… did you like it?" I stuttered uncomfortably. Her eyes widened in what seemed like horror, and then her look morphed into one that let me know I shouldn't have asked that question.

"I can't do this! I can't be involved in whatever high school games you and Bella are playing. Bella is the one you looked so miserable over. Now she's back and you… you can leave me alone. Don't call because I won't answer. Now let go of my door so I can leave!" I did as she asked. I never wanted to hurt Leah and I could tell that somehow I had. I needed to figure out, and be sure of, what I wanted before talking to her again. I would take solace in the fact that she hadn't slept with Ryan and that would have to be good enough for now.