Did You Miss Me?

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N O A H

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N O A H

The steel chair is cold against my back and the seat is uncomfortable to sit on, but I try to push those irrelevant details out of my mind. There are more important things to focus on at the moment.

Erin turns her head to look at me, a concerned look on her face. I know what she's thinking, because it's the exact same thing as literally everyone else.

Are you sure that this is the right call? Do you really think you're ready for this? It's okay to call it quits, you know. I don't want to force you to do something you're going to regret.

I've grown far too accustomed to those kinds of words in the few short weeks since they found me. And not to sound rude or unthankful, but I'm getting kind of sick of being treated like I'm fragile. Like if they make one mistake that I'll slip through their fingers and shatter on the ground.

I'd like to think I'm stronger than that, that I could take a lot more than one hit and survive.

She takes my hand, squeezing it gently for reassurance. I feel like she doesn't understand that I'm not nervous.

"I want you to tell me if this is too much-"

"I'm not afraid." I interrupt her, and the same nauseous feeling wells up in my stomach. She sighs and slides her hand out of mine, moving it to my face. She runs her thumb over a deep cut in my cheek left from a few nights ago, studying my reaction to see if I'm still in pain. Obviously the answer is yes, but the pain is nothing compared to what I've experienced before. Hell, Seth used to cut us open and stick his fingers in the wound, just to watch us squirm. Just to watch us suffer.

"I know you say that, Noah," she starts. Her voice is low and calming.
"And I think that you believe that to be true." She takes a short pause, her breaths staggering in the back of her throat.
"But I just want you to know that it's okay to be afraid. It's okay for you heart to skip a few beats when you see his face. It's okay." She smiles at me.
"You don't have to be unbreakable, Noah." I shift my eyes down and nod my head. I understand her point, but I think I'm going to be alright.

"I'm ready." I say softly and lift my eyes to meet hers again.
"I'm ready to see him." She doesn't try to say anything, to talk me out of it or change my mind. She simply tells them to bring him in. She lays her hand back on mine, and the door opens.

And there he is.

His physique darker than I remember. His large round glasses lay slightly crooked on the edge of his nose and his eyes sparkle with a greyish glow, like they've fogged over. His aroma hits me and for a second I really feel like I'm down there again. His scent of tobacco and peppermint is overwhelming, and it makes me gag.

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