Emo Trinity x Reader

Brendon Urie x Reader - Panic At The Party

Requested on Tumblr
Warnings: description of a panic attack
Word count: 3 065

"It's gonna be fan-ta-stic!"

You raised your eyebrows, well aware that your friend Brendon could not see that through the phone.

"The last time you said that we ended up hiding from your parents in the neighbor's yard for almost half an hour," you told him, randomly walking through your room, playing around with a rubber you found laying on the floor next to your desk.

"Was fun though, right?"

You sighed. "The neighbor almost called the police on us and I got literally thousands of mosquito bites! They're still itching!"

Brendon quietly giggled. "Oh yeah, maybe you just taste delicious."

For a moment you were tempted to respond with one of your usual daring answers like 'Wanna find out?' but if Brendon would say yes, you'd probably start imagining him kissing you and you had done that often enough over the last time, maybe due to the fact that he was really hot, more likely though because you were helplessly in love with him. You bit your tongue just in time and instead decided to change the topic back to the party he had just invited you.

"So why do you want me at Pete's party so desperately anyway," you wondered.

"It's no fun without you," he whined, sounding like a big child.

"Let's face it Bren, ten minutes into the party you will have downed your first beer, twenty minutes into the party you will have found some random, hot chick that you chat up and thirty minutes into the party you are basically grinding against her and will have forgotten about me completely." Being in love with someone who was as good, and interested, in picking up girls as Brendon was, was really not easy. But you were almost used to it by now, almost.

"It's not that bad," he complained.

"Yes, yes it is. And do you know what happened the last time you left me alone at a party?"

Silence sounded loudly from the other side of the mobile. Of course Brendon did not know. You had waited for him to ask, but he never did.

"This creepy footballer tried to get me drunk and when I said no, he started shouting around until Pete, Dallon and Andy dragged him outside.

A quiet "Oh" escaped Brendon and you knew that you had made him feel uncomfortable. But you did not really care, right now you were frustrated that even after years he still dragged you to the parties that you were not interested in. He always told you to hook up with some random guy and enjoy the evening, but you were not the kind of person who that came easily to. Not to mention that every touch by a boy who was not Brendon, felt simply wrong.

After a moment of silence Brendon spoke up again. "So are you gonna come?"

You sighed deeply, entirely done with the enthusiastic man-child on the other end of the line. "Yeah, yeah, I'm gonna come."

~*~

That you were not out to hook up with someone tonight was already visible by the clothes you wore. Too big were the faded band-shirt and too baggy the jeans, not to mention the brightly colored and therefore completely mismatching sneakers. Brendon had picked you up at your home and together you had walked to Pete's house a few blocks away, where the party was taking place. Suspiciously you eyed the family home. You had been to Pete's parties before; they were loud, with many people and lots of alcohol. Worriedly you remembered the panic attacks you had had the last time. You always had dealt with anxiety and uneasiness in crowds but over the last months it had gotten worse. Brendon knew nothing of this when he grabbed your hand and dragged you towards the open house door through which loud music sounded into the street. You had never told him because you did not want to make him worry. In the beginning you had had no idea what was going on, and when you googled the symptoms, you found out that you had in fact suffered a panic attack. The initial impulse was to stay away from situations that could trigger the panic, but you did not want to be controlled by it, so you faced these situations again and again. Most of the times you were lucky, and you got out of them without having an attack, sometimes you were not so lucky.