Emo Trinity x Reader

Dallon Weekes x Reader - Please Don't Jump

Requested on Tumblr
Warnings: implied suicidal intentions
Word count: 1 211

Cool wind fanned over your forehead. Your eyes glided over the sight of the houses to your feet. You were stood on top of a thirty story building, holding tightly onto the balustrade. Sun reflected on the windows down in the city, making you wonder if anyone would see you, if you just let go and jumped. You were standing on the wrong side of the balustrade after all, the tips of your shoes lining up with the edge of the roof.

You were not really suicidal, at least you never considered yourself to be. It was more of a game, a game of control. In every aspect of your life you felt constantly out of control, but here on this roof, faced with the abys to your feet, you had all the control. You could either let go, or you could climb back into safety. It was a game.

While you were standing on next to the edge, marveling at the city beneath you, you wondered what made you come up to the top of this building. How many things had added up that you felt the need to put yourself in such a risk?

Maybe it was the raising rent that you would soon not be able to pay anymore. You had asked your landlord for help, but he had just said that this was the way of life and shut the door in your face. You had been looking for something cheaper for weeks, but most of the cheaper apartments were in the outskirts of the town and then you would have to pay for driving into town every day.

Also your job was stressful and to make you work harder your boss often threatened to fire you. Sometimes you felt the need to tell him that he would not do it anyway, but you were sure that he would certainly fire you after that. So you kept quiet. You had no control over it anyway.

Another thing you had no control over were your parents, or rather, their health. Your father had cancer and it did not look good for him, especially since the health insurance had started to act up. Your mother helped him the best she could, but it was hard on her to see the man she loved dying slowly. It was hard for you too, but it was also hard to see her suffer like that. You tried your best to cheer them both up, but you hardly ever left their house without crying on the bus ride home.

You sometimes wondered if it would be easier if you had someone to talk to, someone who understood you, but your friends were too busy with their own lives to listen to your problems. Yes, maybe they should sometimes make time for you the way you made time for them when they needed it, but you were too polite to ask. You also were in no relationship, and often your bed felt awfully empty and cold at night, making you wish for just some sort of companion. Of course there was the cute neighbor from across the hall, Dallon. He always paid you a compliment when you met at the mailboxes and you often had the impression he was flirting with you when you were riding the elevator together, but you were never sure. You did not know much about Dallon apart from the fact that he was a musician, really sweet and caring, and incredibly handsome. You had sometimes played around with the idea of just going over, knocking at his door and asking him over for coffee, but again his response would be out of your control and you were sick of always depending on others favor and good-will.

And these thoughts brought you up to the roof top in the early evening sun. For a moment you had complete control over everything, letting go, or not. These moments between deciding what you wanted to do, in these moments you were free. You slightly loosened the grip of your right hand around the balustrade, not really intending to let go, just trying it out.

"Don't."

The voice behind you made you flinch and you instinctively tightened your grip again, turning around as good as possible to see who had interrupted you. It was Dallon, tall as always, disheveled brown hair and sparkling blue eyes. Worry was written on his face and he had one hand extended as if approaching a wounded animal.

"Please, don't jump," he told you, his gaze fixed on you.

"I wasn't-"

"Just come back on the roof, please," he pleaded.

"I-" you wanted to explain to him that you had not intended to jump, wanted him to understand why you were up here on the roof, standing on the wrong side of the balustrade. But his look was so full of worry that you decided the explaining had time until you were back on the roof. "Okay."

You gripped tight to the metal of the balustrade and with a few long steps Dallon was at your side, grabbing your wrist to make sure you would not fall if you lost your footing. He helped you climb onto the safe side and the moment your feet touched the ground he wrapped you in his arms.

"You scared the living daylight out of me," he mumbled before pulling away, gazing into your surprised face. "What were you thinking?"

You shrugged, feeling terribly embarrassed to have scared him so much. "I wasn't gonna jump, you know," you told him.

"Then why the hell do you climb over the balustrade on top of a freakishly tall house," he was almost screeching. You flinched a little at the foreign sound.

"It's a control thing," you mumbled, pushing past him, suddenly feeling the need to get away from Dallon. He was only worrying and probably meant it good, but it made you feel uneasy.

"You are aware that there is not much control when a gust of wind blows you off the roof, right," he followed you and almost bumped into you when you stopped and turned around to him.

"I actually do know that. Can we now please drop the subject since we have already identified that I didn't intend to jump?" You were aware of how rude you sounded, but something about Dallon upset you. Maybe that he tried to take the one thing that actually gave you some relief, away from you.

"Okay," he suddenly sounded very small. "I just worried so much when I saw you. I really thought you were gonna jump."

Hell, how could you stay mad at these puppy dog eyes?

"It's fine," you mumbled, placing your hand on his cheek and rubbing it softly. "It's nice to know someone worries."

He smiled shyly at you and you returned the smile, suddenly becoming aware of your hand on his face. You quickly pulled away, but Dallon caught you hand and ran his thumb over the back of it.

"How about we get some pizza together, after this shock," he suggested.

"Sounds amazing," you agreed, blushing terribly.

"Fantastic," even though he tried to hide it, you could hear the enthusiasm in his voice, "Where do you wanna go?"