Just Give Me A Reason || 13 Reasons Why

Tape 2, Side A > Alex

"You've heard of the butterfly effect right? That if a butterfly flaps its wings at just the right time in just the right place... it can cause a hurricane thousands of miles away. It's chaos theory. But, chaos theory isn't exactly about chaos. It's about now a tiny chance in a big system can affect everything. Chaos theory. It sounds dramatic but it's not. Ask a mathematician. Or better yet, ask someone who's been in a hurricane."

"Alex Standall. You caused the hurricane. It's your turn. Little did I know you would F. my L. forever. Little did I know you would be my hurricane. Maybe you think I'm being silly. I'm some stupid girl who gets all worked up over a little thing. But little things matter. For instance, you never told me you were dating Jessica. But I remembered just how it ended: with your list."

"We hadn't talked since you two got together. And then it seemed like maybe you might not b together anymore. Is that why you did it Alex?"

"Alex maybe you think I'm being silly. Like I got my titties in a twist over the tiniest things... but you didn't walk that hall. You didn't feel those eyes on you. You've never heard those whispers."

"At first I thought, what a stupid list. Jessica is so much prettier than me. I didn't think of the chaos it would cause. But it was just a joke. Right Alex? You think I'm taking it all way to seriously. But here's the thing: you've never been a girl."

Oh yeah... that lovely list... I remember that list.

I walk into the library and see Jeff and Clay hard at work. Clay has been tutoring Jeff to keep his U.S. History grade up. I would have offered to tutor him, but he'd never listen to me.

Clay sees me walk in and I motion to him not to say anything to Jeff. I quietly duck behind the rows of books to sneak up behind him. I cover his eyes with my hands.

"Hard at work or hardly working?"

"Depends. If I answer right, do I get a gift?" I roll my eyes.

"Yes. The gift of my presence."

"Then hard at work." I look down and see him drawing, not working.

"You're a dick." He laughs and I move my hands. "Hey Clay."

"Hey Jade."

"So what's the word of the day today?" I ask.

"Unique." Clay answers.

"That's... great." I look over and see Angie staring at her lips... as usual.

"I take it you saw the list." Jeff says causing me to groan.

"That list made by misogynists to feel better about themselves? No thanks."

"This coming from the girl who made 'best eyes'." Jeff says.

"I know I have the best eyes. I don't need a fucking list to tell me that." I spot Skye and go over to her to talk about homework.

Jeff's POV:

I watch Jade go over and talk to Twilight.

"You should get her number." Clay says, throwing my words back at me. I slightly push him.

"It's not even like that. We're just friends."

"But you want it to be more." I sigh.

"Maybe. But I don't know if she feels the same. I mean what if she doesn't? I'll look like an idiot."

"Jeff Atkins looking like an idiot? I didn't think such a thing existed."

"Fuck off Jensen." I look back at Jade. She does have beautiful eyes... and we're together like all the time...

"You won't know unless you try." Clay says.

"Shut up. She's coming back." Jade comes back over to the table.

"What are you two girls whispering about?"

"Nothing." I say.

"Actually, Jeff here had something he wanted to ask you." I kick him under the table. "Ow."

"Well Jeffery?"

"Um... we're having Italian at my place tonight. Did you want to come for uh dinner?" she smiles.

"Sure. I just have to tell Deran."

"So I'll pick you up after school?" she nods.

"Sounds good. I'll see you then. Bye Clay." she leaves.

"See? That wasn't so hard." Clay says. "Very... unique."

"Fuck you."

Shit. She's coming to dinner.

"You want evidence Alex? Do you want storm clouds and thunder? Everyone, go to E-3 on your maps: The Blue Spot liquor store, where butterfly met hurricane. The Blue Spot was a block and a half away from my first house. I went there when I desperately needed chocolate, which turned out to be most days of the week."

"It seems like nothing. Until the hurricane hits. When you put my name on that list, you put a target on... well not just my ass. You made it open season on Hannah Baker."

"The butterfly effect, it started with Justin and then on to you Alex. Then the rest of you. Maybe these tapes will start a new butterfly effect. Who knows? Everything affects everything."

Jade's POV:

"Thank you again for dinner Mr. and Mrs. Atkins."

"No thank you." Mr. Atkins says. "It's nice to have someone else at the table." His mom comes over with a container.

"For Deran." She says, handing it to me.

"Thank you. He'll appreciate it."

"Come by again for dinner." Jeff and I walk back to his car so he can take me home.

"Did you uh... have a good time?" He asks me.

"Great. I always love your mom's cooking." We climb the steps to the front door.

"Jade, I was wondering um if you like where we are... like our relationship." My eyebrows furrow.

"Of course Jeff. You're my best friend. I love being your best friend. You're pretty much all I have."

"Oh. Ok. Good. Great."

"Are you ok?"

"Definitely. I'll see you tomorrow. Good night."

"Good night Jeff." I go into the house. Ok. That was weird.

"How was dinner?" Deran asks me.

"Good. Brought you some back." I hand him the container.

"Thanks." He goes over to the cabinet to figure out which bottle of alcohol goes best. "I don't usually pay attention to this stuff but I couldn't help but overhear you and Jeff."

"And?" Then it hits me. "Oh shit. Really? Fuck! I just friend zoned him." Deran nods. "Ugh! I'm such an idiot. But it doesn't matter. He wouldn't go for someone like me."

"Oh please Jade."

"No it's true D. He's Jeff Atkins, high school bachelor and star baseball player and I'm Jade Adams... loner. And I don't want to lose him as a friend if we break up. So it's best this way."

"I understand that but you are beautiful, smart and kind hearted and any guy would be lucky to have you. Never forget that."