I Don't Wanna Break

Complicated

I wince as Nat tugs the shirt down over my body. The bruises there have faded to a pale yellow but they still hurt as much as they did when they were inflicted.

Tonight we're playing our first big show at this huge theater. Linda is making me wear a horrible outfit.

"You look uh, pretty." Nat says.

I look at myself in the mirror. I do look pretty but this outfit is just awful. I'm wearing black skinny jeans, white stilettos and a white crop top with our band name written on it. It's a nice outfit, I just don't like it because my stomach is showing.

The bruise there is barely noticeable, which is good. Linda was pissed when she found out about what happened. We had to postpone the show because of it. She offered to put a restraining order on Niall but I refused. It wouldn't stop him anyways.

I haven't been able to sleep since that day. Louis said after Niall left he disappeared. They've been looking everywhere for him but have had no luck. This scares me a lot. Knowing that he is out there and that he could get me at any time and do only god knows what to me.

When I do sleep, all I get is nightmares. One was so bad that the next morning I kept throwing up, I wouldn't eat and I would start crying at random times. It was crazy. I've never had nightmares so badly, but ever since my encounter with him, I've been on edge.

"Yea I guess I don't look to bad." I say as I turn and look at myself in the mirror at different angles. "These pants make my ass look big." I giggle.

Nat rolls her eyes. "No they don't. Your ass was already big, these just emphasize it." We both laugh.

"We need to do something with that hair." She states.

I nod and sit down in the chair so she can work her magic. Linda let me hire Nat as my personal stylist. Nat was ecstatic when she found out.

"Done." She turns the around so I'm facing the mirror. "What do ya think?"

She didn't do much to it. She put it in a pony tail and pushed my bangs into my face. "I love it. It's out of my face."

"I figured you'd like that." She smiles at me in the mirror.

I stand and walk to the door. "One more thing." I say. I undo my stilettos and toss them to the side. I grab my black and white converse and a pair of socks and put them on.

"Really?" Nat asks.

"What?" I shrug my shoulders. "It's the signature piece to any outfit I wear. Converse go good with anything."

She shakes her head and follows me out the door. I walk to Jesse's dressing room at the end of the hall and run in without knocking. Nat mutters a 'bye' and I slam the door shut. He turns to face me quickly and screams.

I laugh loudly and he blushes. "Knock next time!" He screams.

"Why? I like the view." I lean against the wall and smirk at him.

He rolls his eyes and starts searching for something to wear in the clothes hung on the rack. Right now he was in nothing but his boxers. Which left his perfectly sculptured body in view.

"Help me." he says desperately.

I huff and walk to his clothes rack. I pull out a outfit similar to mine. Black skinny jeans, a white button up shirt and a pair of black vans.

"Wear this. We can match."

He grabs it and starts getting dressed. I watch his every move and blush when he catches me staring.