Your voice: so far away (completed)

20. Chris

In the morning I decided to go for an early morning walk to Amy's. When I got there her grandparents let me in and they took me into the living room where I saw Amy sleeping peacefully on the sofa. I looked back at them and gave them a small nod and they both gave me a warm smile and left me alone with Amy. I walked over to her and crouched down in front of her. She had a few little lose strands that had fallen on to her face. She looked so peaceful when she slept, I was glad she was finally peaceful after everything that had happened to her lately.

Then I saw her eyes open slowly. Her light brown eyes met mine instantly and she gave me the same smile of joy that she gave me everyday before we broke up and got back together. I'd never realised how much I had missed that smile until now. Just the sight was enough to brighten up your day but knowing you were the cause of it made you feel even better, like you were wrapped tightly in a warm blanket.
" How long have you been there?" She said in a half asleep kind of tone.
" less then a minute or so." I smiled. She pushed herself up so she was sat up with her legs to her side.
" What time is it?" She asked in the middle of a stretch.
" its only 9am." I said.
" Damn it." She mumbled making me laugh.
" Why what time did you want it to be?" I asked.
" 5am." She said, finally starting to wake up fully.
" You seriously wake up at 5am!" I said shocked.
" thats when I usually wake up." She said obviously not understanding why I was so shocked.
" Why?" I tilted my head at her in confusion.
" I don't know, just always like 5am I guess." She smiled. " You look so much like Shep when you do that." She laughed.
" Hey!"
" what? Shep's cute." She smiled making me smile.
" So you think I'm cute?" I smirked.
" No, I said Shep was cute." She laughed.
" That's it!" I said before getting up and tickling her ribs. She was so ticklish it was unbelievable, she'd fallen to the ground laughing and clutching her stomach within seconds.
" Ok!... ok! I give up!....just.....stop." She couldn't catch her breath, she was laughing so hard.

We both had breakfast at hers before setting off and going for a walk around the open fields. We were holding each other's hands as they swung joyfully in time with every step. We decided to go to the little hideaway I'd taken her to the other day. We sat down in the safety of the trees and bushes that surrounded us. I held Amy in my arms as she laid back on the ground with her head rested just next to mine. Her hair was soft and silky against my cheek. Her breathing was steady and relaxed. She held my hand and started to play with my fingers as if she'd never seen them before. I laughed as she did this and she looked up at me and smiled. She brought her legs to her side and closed her eyes gently as her head rested on my chest. She wasn't asleep but it seemed as if she might be. I ran my fingers through her hair, watching my fingers slide effortlessly through each strand of silky platinum blonde hair.
" So was this the colour you hair used to be?" I asked. Her eyes remained closed but she answered.
" Yeah, why?" She said in a relaxed tone.
" Just always wondered. So why did you dye your hair brown for a while when I first met you?"
" Thought it was more normal. I thought I'd fit in more with brown hair."
" Why would you ever want to fit in?" She opened her eyes and lifted herself up to look me in the eyes.
" What do you mean." She had a confused smile and look in her eyes.
" well lots of people 'fit in' but for all the wrong reasons. Isn't it a good thing to stand out?"
" Only if you stand out for the right reasons. Standing out because your the girl who gets into fights everyday isn't really the best."
" yeah but thats not who you are, your the girl who everyone finds funny and kind, well when you want to be."
" Yeah well funny only gets you so far. Sometimes you tell a bad joke or you just cant bare to think of a joke to tell cause your too shy."
" I like that you shy." She lifted an eyebrow and tilted her head.
" Why?"
" Means I don't have to share you with many people and I don't have to compete with anyone." She laughed and laid her head back down on my chest.
" your crazy you know that right?" She said still laughing.
" YEP!" I laughed.

We sat there for a while talking to each other and occasionally making each other laugh. Then when the sun started to set I noticed Amy had gone quiet. She looked as if she had something on her mind but when I asked her what was wrong she smiled and said she was just daydreaming. I knew she was lying by the fact she couldn't even manage to look me anywhere near my eyes. I made my grip round her slightly tighter and I could tell she had noticed but she didn't push herself to a ask why. Something Ive noticed about Amy thats changed since she's been back is that she no longer pushes herself to ask questions. Its almost as if she's afraid to. Or maybe she just doesn't want to come off as being nosy.

I walked Amy back to her house and even then she seemed a bit quiet. Again I asked her what was wrong, but again she somehow managed to find an excuse.
" I'm just tired; thats all." I gave her a look that made it seem as if I believed her but really I knew something was wrong. Amy's never this quiet, she's always got something to yell about or joke about and even when she's tired you can barely tell cause she wont shut up. So for her to go all quiet all of a sudden makes me fill with concern. But now I feel out of my depth. I want o be there for her to know whats going on but I cant. Still we carry on walking until we reach her front door. I kiss her goodbye and watch as she closes the door behind her before I turn my back to leave.

On the walk home my head is filled with questions and possible answers but no confirmation as to whether any of them are correct. All I'm left with at this point is questions with no answer.