I've been laying on the ground of my room in the dark watching Shane Dawson. Then I started listening to music. I have no motivation right now. I need to shower because I need to take care of myself but I don't want to. I should probably eat but I don't want to. I feel sick. Not like throwing up sick but pain but not cramps just pain.
I probably had around 800-900 calories today. Less than a healthy amount but it feels like too much. I want to lose a good 30 pounds but people are paying attention to how much I eat now.
Uhg.
I think that if I was skinnier, and had a better face I could model. Not like real model but Aesthetic Tumblr Boy™️. Because that is my fashion. I like colorful jeans and jean jackets and flowey flowery stuff but I'm fat and ugly so nah.
YOU ARE READING
I'm trans and problematic
RandomThis is my second journal about being trans. Don't even both reading. I'll probably be dead in a week or two anyways. *trigger warning for the first few chapters*