Life of the Mockingjays (Sequel to Panem High)

PTSD

The next day.

Katniss P.O.V

I lay in bed , unable to sleep. It's been like this since 4 am this morning. It's horrible. Any time my eyes close all I can see is those 3 people that we lost. An orphan , a brother and sister who surely had parents. And by me dragging them into it , that's all gone. It's all my fault. But this is how it was supposed to be. I knew there would be sacrifice , people we couldn't save but I didn't think about how it was all my fault. I feel terrible. It's currently 6am and I am very tired but I know that if I close my eyes to sleep , I will be met by a nightmare. I can't risk any more lives. Nothing is the same now. We nearly lost Finnick , Marvel and Ashton. We nearly lost 2 mermaids and we lost a vampire and 2 wolves. From now on I need to protect. I need to protect everyone , even if it means a worse fate for me. I will still protect them. After all I probably wouldn't be sane without them. I mean after most my family died. I mean sure, I have clove and my aunt and uncle but I don't have my mom. I don't have either of my dads and worst of all. I don't have my little duck anymore. I want her back. I want them all back. At least I have Cameron now. My twin, I actually need to talk to my parents about that one. My mol never told me about her. Even when she married Plutarch who was rich. We could have afforded her then. Why didn't we go back for her. I want answers. Anyway there's no point in getting upset about it because I'm sure she had a good reason for it. Plus I have other things to worry about.

I sigh and roll over. May as well get ready. I climb out of bed and head to the shower, careful bot to wake anyone. I undress and climb in before turning the hot water on. I wash my hair with strawberry scented shampoo and conditioner before using my soap and glory shower cream and scrub. When I'm finished I step out and wrap a red towel around me. Red, like the blood that came from the wounds if this who died. Suddenly all I can see is red and I enter a flashback. The first flashback in a long time.

-----flashback-----

I start running when I hear screeches but they are not from the creatures. I run faster as the sound gets louder and when I get to the end I see finnick covered in blood which is coming from a huge gash in his stomach. "Finnick!" I shout and he slowly looks towards me. He smiles weakly at me and then lays his head back. I rush to his side and go to pull out the bottle. I search my pockets for it and realize that I must have lost it. I kneel

next to him and take his hand while putting one over the gash. "Deep in the meadow , under the willow , a bed of grass , a soft green pillow. Lay down your head and close your eyes and in the morning the sun will rise. Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true. Here is the place where I love you" I sing quietly.

-----End of Flashback-----

I open my eyes and see tears streaming down my face. Is Finnick alive. Suddenly my mind goes blank of everything that happened. "Finnick" I breathe out and rush to his room, I grab a robe on the way out and wrap it around myself. When I get to his room I don't see him and start to freak out. Why can I not remember if we saved him. "Katniss?" I hear a voice say questionably and I look up to see Finnick. "Finnick!" I say and hug him. "What's wrong?" He asks wrapping his arms around me in a brotherly way. "I picked up a red towel and then it reminded me of blood and then I had a flashback of when you were injured but it stopped before you healed and then I couldn't remember if I lost you and I got scared so I came here and when I didn't see you I got scared" I said quickly and he hugs me tighter. "I'm here , it's okay" he says and I smile and pull away from the hug. "Why are you awake?" He asks curiously. "Well anytime I tried to sleep the memories would replay in my head. His eyes widen a bit. "And you said you had a flashback which was triggered by the colour if the towel?" He asks and I nod again. "Well yeah but I don't think that means anything , do you?" I ask and he smiles weakly as he bites his lip. "Uh Katniss I think you need to talk to someone" he says and I shake my head. "I'm not crazy" I say , hating the thought of having to spill my thoughts to someone. "Katniss" he says softly. "I don't think your crazy. Having flashbacks triggered by something can mean something. It sounds like you have PTSD" he tells me and my eyes widen slightly. "It would explain the nightmares and flashbacks" he said. I look up at him and he looks so worried. I nod slightly. "They will help you" he said trying to convince me. "And what am I supposed to tell them. That I have magic powers and me and my friends just helped save the world from creepy shadows who were out to kill us and then healed my friends who also have magic powers. Helped out mermaids. Asked my other friends brother who is a werewolf to help us and then have vampires on our side. Oh and all my friends have magic powers too." I say and he chuckles slightly. "Well that's one way of putting it. Just say that you keep having nightmares and triggered flashbacks and they won't push much further" he said and I bid as I consider it. "Fine , find me someone to see and I'll go" I say and he nods. "Well I'm going to go get dressed. I'm glad your alive by the way and I'll see you downstairs?" I ask and he nods. "See you downstairs" he confirms and I walk away to get dressed. Both annoyed and relieved. Annoyed that I have to go to therapy and relieved that Finnick is alive. He is honestly like a brother to me. I couldn't imagine what I would have done if he was dead.