Deal or no Deal (#teambabe)

39

Mika
Naalimpungatan ako sa mga masuyong haplos na pamilyar sa akin. Isang tao lang ang nakakapagparamdam sakin ng ganito.

I opened my eyes at sumalubong sakin ang mga dimples nyang kitang kita dahil sa pagkakangiti nya.

Darn, I miss her so much!

Agad akong bumangon at mahigpit syang niyakap.

Ang there's this security that only in her arms I can find.

Mas hinigpitan ko pa ang yakap afraid that if I will loosen it just a bit ay mawawala syang muli sakin.

"I miss you! I miss you! I miss you!" Paulit ulit kong bulong sa kanya while kissing her temple. I did not hear any response from her so i leaned back to look at her only to find out that she is crying.

I panicked.

"Babe, please wag ka nang umiyak. I promise from this day onwards na lagi kong ipapakita at ipaparamdam sayong mahal kita. Hindi na ako mahihiya. Dahil ngayon alam ko nang kung mahirap ipatanggap sa ibang tao yung magiging relasyon natin ay higit na mahirap tanggapin na mawawala ka sakin. Please Babe, i'm sorry kung ngayon ko lang to sinasabi. I promise i will be better." Sunod sunod at walang patid na paliwanag ko sa kanya which leaves no room for an arguement. Para malaman na nya lahat at hindi na sya magdalawang-isip na balikan ako.

But she just stared at me smiling.

I started to panick again.

Alyssa's silence.
Her tears.
Her smile that shows all her dimples but never reach her eyes.

It scares me.

"Babe, say something." I said caressing her cheeks. Tuloy tuloy na ding umaagos ang luha sa aking mga mata dahil sa takot na unti-unting nabubuo sa aking puso.

"I'm sorry." She said. Her voice is strangely deep. Like it was coming from somewhere far.

"No, Babe. Don't apologise. You did nothing but to love me unconditionally. I should be the one saying sorry for all the pain I put you through. I'm sorry for being so stupid that I have to loose you first before I came to realised how much I need you in my life. How I want you in my life. I'm sorry for being such a jerk." I said pleading.

Nanatili lang syang umiiyak at nakatingin sa akin with her sad smile.

"I'm sorry." Once again she told me in the same manner like it was coming from somewhere very far. Or deep. I can't explain why it was like that but i just shrugged it off for that moment. She is more important.

She is here.

With me.

Ngunit nagtaka ako ng bigla syang naging blurred. I thought it was just because of the tears that never stop running down form my eyes but when I blink, she is already far away from me.

I tried to get up to reach for her but she's slowly fading until she was nowhere to be found.

"Ly! Ly! Babe, please. Wag mo kong iwan! Not again. I promise I will be a better person. A better half to you. Just please stay. Babe! Alyssa!" I keep on shouting as a turned my head left and right to search for her but she is gone.

"Ly!!!!" I keep on shouting and I feel that my breathing is unsteady.

I tried to catch it up with a deep and long breathing but i am failing. Habang tumatagal ay lalo akong nahihirapan hanggang sa tuluyan na akong nahilo at bumagsak.

"Ly." I whisper while trying so hard to breathe some air.

"Mika!" Someone slapped me na agad nakapagpabangon sa akin. Just when I opened my eyes, my family's worried faces greeted me.