Skinny Boy ✔

Chapter 11: the pines beyond

The last day of school brought with it kids who were antsy to leave, and me, who was antsy to get my hands on those steroids. As soon as lunch arrived, I took off to the pines beyond the school before anyone I knew could look for me, and paid Aaron for the contents inside the brown paper bag he handed to me. I checked inside to make sure the pills were actually in there. Fool me once, right? I thanked him, then thanked him again when he wished my relative the best.

I couldn't help but humor myself with the thought that I have a really nice drug dealer. It just doesn't sound right. It's an oxymoron, with extra moron.

~

"Wake up, birthday boy!" mom chirped.

I suppressed a groan and forced my aching body to get up. I wonder how she came to the conclusion that letting Jamie throw balloons at me when I was half awake was a better idea than letting me sleep in. How could anyone, let alone my own mother who knows I'm not a morning person, think it to be a good idea? And on the first day of summer, of all days she chose. Granted, neither of us chose for me to be born on that specific day, but my point still stands.

Make sure he takes them in the morning. Or, at least with a meal. Aaron's voice echoed in my head as I rummaged through my dresser for a shirt. These are bitches on the stomach, so it's better to split 'em into small doses and take them throughout the day.

Screw that.

I wanted to take them in the morning, but I knew I couldn't risk it with so many eyes on me that day, waiting for me to come down at any moment. Plus, I didn't want to abandon the time schedule I already had for my cycle.

My cycle...oh no. I forgot I'm supposed to skip for a week and a half longer for my PCT! Wait...I never got the supplements for my PCT!

How could I be so irresponsible? Idiot!

Unprepared. I'm unprepared.

That word, unprepared, kept echoing in my head over and over again.

And then the smell of bacon waft into my room, and I couldn't help myself but to give in to my senses, ignore my thoughts, and follow the trail of good smells.

"What do you wanna do today?" my mom asked when I got downstairs. "We could go swimming, go to the arcade, whatever you'd like."

"The arcade?" I scoffed. "Mom, this isn't the 80's. I don't think there are any arcades around anymore, except for at discount theaters and restaurant waiting areas."

She pursed her lips into a tight line. "Fair enough."

"Actually, I was going to just hang out with some friends later. Nothing special."

"Aw," she pouted dramatically. "My wittle baby is too old for birday pawties."

I rolled my eyes. "Poor thing, you."

She flashed a smile, sliding a plate with bacon and eggs on it across the island. It was my turn to smile now.

My favorite. Plus, the high amounts of protein doesn't hurt, either.

~

I silently thanked God for whoever made the first cellphone, because I could read nutrition labels online for the food I'd just ordered, while still appearing nonchalant in front of my friends. So long as they didn't peek over my shoulder to see what I was looking at, I was good.

Luckily for me, with enough laughing when they laughed and a few glances up here and there, no one suspected a thing. I was both proud and ashamed of how naturally these nefarious behaviors now came to me. I took a screenshot of the information I needed and tucked my phone away, free to enjoy the rest of my time with my friends...or at least pretend to.

Just try to focus on what's happening right now. Stop worrying about your gains. Stop worrying about steroids and calories and hormones. Relax.

But the other half of my brain would not relax. Once again, a battleground was ignited, and a war zone was happening in the pockets of my thoughts. While I thought like a normal person would, the back of my mind was screaming with constant complaints.

All of this, and yet I could somehow simultaneously hold conversation in between it all. Once again, I was both proud and ashamed, though this time around, I was a little more proud of myself than ashamed.

Then, as we neared the end of the meal, something was said that made my thoughts all halt to a stop, then go haywire.

"You wanna make s'mores at my house tonight?" Henry asked.

Empty calories. Junk food. Fatty foods. This is going to add to my waist.

I pulled the first question out of my head to withhold an answer. "Are you sure your parents would be okay with it?" Yes. Act like you don't want to be a nuisance to her parents.

"Of course! It's only appropriate that you celebrate your sweet sixteen with your twin," she said with a wink. In spite of my racing thoughts, I couldn't help but smile at our old nickname for each other. She went by Henry, and my last name was Henry, so, naturally, it just seemed right to call each other twin. "Besides, Addi would want to see you." She shook her head with a smile. "I swear, she has a slight crush on you. She won't admit it, but I think she believes she's going to marry you someday."

I would be an asshole to say no at this point. No matter how well I hid it, I knew that deep inside, I had some sort of a soft spot, especially for little deaf girls named Addison who thought I was the coolest kid in the world. "Okay," I said, forcing a smile. "Let me check with my parents."

I could have pretended to call them and given the excuse that they said no, but there were a few reasons I didn't do that. Among them was the smile that Henry wore on her face, which somehow amplified what little conscious I had left.

There's no escaping this, is there?

Snapshot.

~

Hey guys! Sorry for this being late. Not only did I have a retreat with my worship team (which was pretty amazing, by the way), but my mom's been sick with bronchitis. She gets it a lot, unfortunately. This recent illness that preceded and provoked it has been kicking her butt. So, being the runner-up woman of the house, I've been trying to help around the house.

Plus, I've been procrastinating, so there's that.

Don't worry, though, because I recently wrapped up my other book I was working on. So updates should be more consistent from here on out.

How have y'all been?

Thoughts on the chapter?

What do you think about the internal dialogue of him fighting with himself?

Any feedback on this chapter or the book as a whole? Let me know, I appreciate it.

Have a wonderful rest of the week. <3 :)