Skinny Boy ✔

Chapter 32: power to the protein

I swigged down another gulp of my shake, swallowing it hard. I knew it was all delusion, but sometimes it almost felt like I could feel the protein absorbing into my body. I knew it didn't work that way, but there was something about knowing that those actions would soon take effect, it made me feel proactive. That was an essential part of what kept me going in a chase that, at times, felt like vain attempts to change. 

Pressing my palms against my forehead, I squeezed my eyes together, willing an oncoming headache away. I rolled my tongue against the insides of my cheeks, tasting the stickiness that lingered long after taking a drink. The fact that I was pretty much living off protein powders at this point didn't help with taking away the chalky feeling in my mouth. 

Just a few more reps. Just a few more, and then I'll be done. 

I had reached a sort of plateau in my bodybuilding progress in the winter months. I had conjured up excuse after excuse, excusing myself because of holidays and rough friendships. But now, I had nothing getting in the way of pushing myself to the next people. 

I can't stop now, I can't settle for mediocre. I have to keep pushing. 

Through the piercing pain in my shoulder and the aching in my every muscle, I pushed myself to lift up the weights, again and again, well beyond what I planned my reps to be. 

I don't need to stick to the sets today. They're only there to give me an idea of how much I need. They're the minimum, not the maximum. 

Taking a deep breath, I used the last bit of energy in me

I watched myself in the mirror as I lifted the barbell over my head one last time, then slowly brought it back down. By that point, my arms refused to let me lift anymore. With shaky arms, I bent over and dropped the weights, sucking in a sharp breath on the way down. I crouched down next to them, rolling the weights off and heading off to put them back. 

Yeah, I pushed myself hard this time. Perhaps I pushed a little too hard, though, because as I walked back to get the rest of the weights, the whole room started spinning. I closed my eyes, and the next thing I knew, I was on the ground, two guys and a lady by my side. One was a fellow gym-goer, the other two were employees. 

It took me a moment to come to, and took a little longer for me to process what had happened. I passed out. 

I turned my head side to side, trying to shake this fuzziness out of my mind, and caught feeling of my sweaty cheek against the cold floor. It felt nice, like playing with a garden hose on a blazing hot day. I was almost tempted to stay there and let the floor absorb all my problems. The thought, however appealing it may have seemed at the time, immediately left my head when I heard the words being spoken from one employee to the other. 

"Maybe we should call an ambulance," the lady said to the guy. 

"No," I shook my head, stretching my arms back to push myself into a sitting position. I squinted at the lights that suddenly seemed a whole lot brighter than before. 

The other guy, whose workout I'd obviously interrupted, pressed his hand against my shoulder, persuading me to lie back down. "Hey, man, I don't think you should get up just yet." 

"I'm fine," I said, sitting up all the way. I ignored the way the room spun around for a moment or two. "I just got up too fast." 

"Do you have any conditions?" one of them asked me. I didn't see who, because I was too busy trying to blink away the pressure in my head. 

"No," I answered. Slowly, I hoisted myself to a stand. 

"When was the last time you drank something?" the guy asked. "You could be dehydrated."