What I'd do for Love

Justin

I saw everything.
I saw Grey kill Lester, I saw his bag shake, and I saw my own hands reach for the knife before I realised what I was doing. I weighed it in my hands before realising that I had to the the right thing: an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth.
A soul for a soul.
I stepped forward, pinned his arms, tied his legs with mine, and put the knife to his neck, pushing ever so slightly.
I saw his facial expression change from a triumphant victory, to a fatal loss.
"Care to explain yourself?" I whispered into his ear, watching sweat collect on his body. Nerves. He's been caught in the act.
"J-Justin. It's not what you t-think, I promise." I heard the stutter clear through his mouth, and knew he was flat out lying to my face. How could he go and do something like this? God, he was so quiet, so normal.
He created his facade well.
"Oh yeah?" I said, working menace and anger into my voice as I spoke "well what is it? Because I just saw you murder Lester!" I wasn't on good terms with him, but it doesn't mean that I could ignore a murderer. If only I'd known it was Grey earlier...
"Self defence! He tried to kill me!" I heard Grey's excuse between deaf ears
Kill him. Go on. Do it. You know you want to. He's probably killed everyone else here too. Who else would? You know what this means..?
We've solved the mystery. I get it.
"You know I can do some damage, remember?" Grey was desperate. The tone changed. He knew he'd been caught. He knew he was fucked
He knew I had him.
I gripped the knife tightly, just to make sure I wouldn't drop it, and he wouldn't escape. Killers are killers, no matter what... right?

So what am I?

Am I justified for what I did, back at the restaurant, a timeline ago? Maybe I am, maybe I'm not. But if I'm going to hell im taking a few people with me down there.

But first of all, I needed a straight answer from Grey. Any way possible.
"You wanna lie to me? Alright. We can play this game." I gritted my teeth as I thought of what to do. Nothing I said would break him, so I'd have to act. I've have to torture. I guess I could defend my actions, but not extremely well. It's better than nothing I suppose. In the end, your body will win over your mind. The workers over the boss. The primal instinct over the human shield. Slow torture would be the best way. I pulled out his right arm, held it straight, and sliced down, crisply cutting the air until it met Grey's hand. And cut thought it cleanly. There was no sawing involved. No nothing. Just a clean slash. I felt his body shudder as he opened his mouth to scream, but I covered it just in time. My hand moved on its own, and the knife entered his kneecap, splitting the bone and leaving a wound that wouldn't let him walk.

Unfortunately, if I held my hand here.... There's no other choice. He's killed Lester... and- no he wouldn't. He couldn't... could he?

I pulled his tongue out, already moving my body to slash it, before he pushed my hand away, stammering "n-no!" He was begging for mercy...
I bet Red begged for mercy. Grey didn't give it to him. Go on. Ask. ASK
"You... you killed Red... didn't you?" I asked. His lips were sealed and his eyes were glued to the ground. The silence gave me my answer, but I wanted him to say it, to own it. I wanted him to know he was a crazy murderer.
"DIDN'T YOU?!" I shouted louder, about to kill him for his acts.
"Yes." I heard the timid reply come out of his mouth.
Here's our killer. What are you gonna do now?
SHUT. UP. AND GET OUT OF MY HEAD. LET ME THINK.
Nope. My turn to control.
My arms moved on their own, putting the knife behind the back of his head, and tabbing straight through to his mouth, cutting deep and through. Fuck, I could tell that would leave a hole that wouldn't be repaired. Everything moved on its own, like primal instinct as the knife was twisted and pulled out, ripping shards of bone, flesh, and gooey marrow with it. The knife was then plunged into his chest from the front, and my arms pushed him back onto the floor. I took a step back, and watched the life brain out of him as he bled out onto the floor, blood filling the space between all the bottles and tobacco.

It wasn't a pretty sight, and it wasn't a wonderful one, but I stood by and watched it happen, a calm look on my face, and no movement from my bones. He died just like every other human: peacefully in the end. I didn't carve his chest open and ripped his pieces out, no. I just let it happen. I just watched by.
You aren't any better than him. You murderer. Fucking disgusting murderer.
You did this. Not me.
You did. I'm your instinct. I'm the thing you hide from. The thing you mask. I. AM. YOU
I looked at the knife lodged in his stomach, and thought the same thing. I am no better than him. I am nothing. I am worthless. Fuck. That's a problem.
"J-Justin? What..?" I heard a timid voice ask.

There was Anna, standing there, looking at what I'd done. Me: coated in blood, watching someone bleed to death calmly. Grey, dead on the floor, stabbed from behind. Lester, also dead. It would take some explaining.
I opened my mouth to speak, and just watched as she walked towards Grey, pulled out the knife, and walked away again.

That's it Lackey.
What do you mean?
You've avenged Red, you've got rid of the murderer. What now?
Back to normal life, I suppose.
Oh, please... you know as well as I do, that you'll never settle down now. You've felt a rush of adrenaline you've never had before. This is you. A murderer.
I did the right thing.
You used Red's death as an excuse to do whatever you want. Just like Grey used his excuse of his love to do whatever he wanted. Isn't it freeing?
Not really, I'm feeling guilty and bloody.
You are so boring it's ridiculous.
Well, let's worry about that later. I think I should catch up to Anna
Maybe. Maybe.
I think we're beginning to get along.
Get real..
I have. I just killed Red's murderer.

And I feel great.

THE END