RUINED ALREADY [18+]

|Four|

A coward's only weapon is his gun.
~Emilio

♠Emilio♠

I always prided myself on being a man who could read people well. Guess their next move, sense their fear through their eyes. But this woman's eyes were soulless, empty. As she watched me I could sense she was still wary of my motives, I didn't blame her. I didn't trust myself, too.

I left her with the gun because as a predator it was good to allow your prey some form of illusion that by having the weapon they had the power, the upper hand. My father had proved to me how wrong that philosophy was. Ammunitions didn't make you strong. Your words were your weapon. At least mine were. I had seen how quickly the fire in her eyes died when I had commanded her earlier. That type of power couldn't be bought by wielding a weapon. It was a manifestation of the power that was already inside.

She stared at me with newfound interest. And something about those eyes reminded me of her. Though it couldn't be. That girl had been vulnerable. Her soul was laid bare in her eyes. But still I knew without a doubt I was staring into the eyes that had haunted me for years. The eyes of the girl I could have saved and set free. Yet I had walked away. It had taken me months to stop dreaming of her. Until now. Her stare was intrusive, almost as if she knew my secrets.

"What happened to the man last night?" she asked yet again.

"He's dead. I killed him."

"Why don't you want to tell me? What if this all comes back to bite us in the behind?"

I recalled the way that fucker choked on his own bloody before I emptied my bullets into his head.

"It won't. Now quite asking m the same question, it's fucking annoying."

She huffed. "You're fucking annoying."

I'd driven home with brain tissues all over me and I didn't give a damn. Little Miss Black Dress was a lifeless heap in my arms. Whatever had possessed me to hold her the way I did was alien to me. Yet here she was acting like a spoilt brat with no gratitude to give.

"But the police must be––"

"I had it taken care of. He'll no longer be of any threat to you."

She frowned. "What those that mean?"

"None of your concern. You should be grateful I saved you."

"Well thank you...?"

She was seeking my name. I didn't give it. A name was an intimate commodity, a virtue.

"You're welcome."

She gave me an annoyed look. "Who was he, the man?"

"You ask a lot of questions."

A storm was building in those dark, beguiling eyes.

"Oh, I apologise if I want to know what transpired last night!" she snapped. "I was almost kidnapped. Attempted to be drugged and taken."

"The man who I murdered for you was working for a local human trafficking ring. I did some digging. They are sloppy and lurking into someone else's turf."

Her hand flew to her throat and her breath hitched.

"Someone else's turf?" she snarled. "You say it so nonchalantly as if it's okay to kidnap women to be sold into prostitution."

"You have nothing to fear. He's dead," I deadpanned.

Her eyes flew to mine with uncertainty.

"I murdered him," I reiterated, more for myself than her.

I had killed a man last night and I had felt...free. If I were to be honest I hadn't ended his life for honorable reasons. His wicked intentions had helped served his execution.

"Just because you kill something doesn't mean it stays dead," she grumbled.

I couldn't help the smile that tugged my lips. "Wise words." I was the living testament to that, too.

She reached towards the nightstand to tuck the gun inside.

"You should keep it."

Her head snapped up towards me and I certain she would get whiplash. "What am I supposed to do with it? I don't even know how to use a gun."

"That's unfortunate."

"And it would be illegal."

I laughed. "Illegal, querida? How so?"

"I would be carrying an unlicensed firearm."

"Technically it's not. I have the necessary licenses to carry a lot more where that came from."

"Nevertheless."

Her slender fingers stroked the weapon almost with reverence.

"I can show you how to use it."

Once the words were out I wanted to take them back. Maybe it was the yearning I saw in her eyes or the need to know yet she was fighting an internal conflict. Somehow I could see a part of y younger self through her eyes.

"Why would you do that for a complete stranger?"

I noticed how her eyes took in my body, roaming over the tattoos. There wasn't anything sexual about her appraisal, just curiosity. The last time a woman had been curious about me she didn't service the ride.

Her appraising gaze moved towards my eyes.

"Because I was once like you."

"I don't think you were once like me."

"You'd be surprised."

I wanted to know about her. What had happened to her that day when I had left Juan Carnilio's residence? But I knew asking that question would lead us down a path none of wanted to go. And she wouldn't appreciate that.

"I don't think it would be wise to show me how to use a weapon," she said quietly.

"And why is that?"

Her dark eyes couldn't have created more shadows than it did at that moment.

"It would be unwise because I have this darkness inside me that's begging to be unleashed."

Her eyes watered. "I shouldn't be thinking this and it's wrong but I–I just want to make...blood run. Be free."

Her words both surprise and ignited something within me. I felt like we were kindred souls, twisted and destined to unleash the hell that had been forced upon us.

"But I can't as the man I want to make feel my pain is long dead."

Juan Carnilio. I knew I should have emptied my barrel in his head that day.

The sudden ringing of a phone prompted her to jump from the bed towards the purse she carried last night.

"Hello?" she croaked.

"Penelope!" a male voice screeched down the line. "Oh thank God!"

"Brad? What's wrong?"

"You didn't come home last night and I was worried..."

The rest of the sentence trailed off as she moved towards the window. Was this man her boyfriend, husband? Attached friend? I choose the latter. Having a man wouldn't sit right with her. Too much would be expected of her.

She gripped the bridge of her nose. "I ran into some mishap last night. Just staying with a friend. I'll call you back, OK?"

She sat quietly for a while. "Um, can you drop me somewhere?"

"Get dressed, eat, then we leave."