RUINED ALREADY [18+]

|Twenty-Eight|

♦Penelope♦

Christmas was in the air. It used to be one of my favorite holidays. But now it meant nothing to me. I could see Brad from my window as he put up his decorations. It had been a week since that night. I pretended nothing had happened and Emilio didn't touch me again since. Well, I didn't count the chaste kisses he offered. They lacked the passion they used to have.

The way he held me at nights felt as though he feared I would burn him. We woke up on opposite sides of the bed. The urge to cry was becoming a burden ad the days past. The one thing that continued to baffle me was Emilio's constant presence. Why was he still around?

Endless possibilities flooded my mind and none made me feel confident.

I wasn't mad at him. I'd accepted that whatever was going on between us was only a short time. I'd been so happy and stupid. Of course a woman like me didn't get happily ever afters. There would only be pain and heartache. Men like Emilio didn't want women like me. He ended up with women like Gabrielle. Not former sex slaves.

It was a painful realization but I needed it.

I looked at Brad again. We hadn't spoken since he'd kissed me and told me he loved me. I left the house and made my way to his house.

"Hey," I murmured timidly.

He seemed surprised to see me.

"Penelope, how are you?"

His eyes flickered to my driveway.
"Emilio's not there," I told him.
His eyes met mine and he seemed genuinely uncomfortable.

"I know, I saw him sped off like the devil was at his rear end. Nice car."

The silence was stretching and tension built in the air.

"You said something to me the other night," I began.

"Yeah, in the heat of the moment. I-I was just upset is all."

"Oh."

A small part of me that hoped he was telling the truth and a felt a flicker of disappointment. Brad could hardly look at me and I didn't know if he was telling the truth or blatantly lying.

"Nice decorations," I commended.

He gave me a genuine smile. "Thanks. I noticed you didn't have any. Will you new...boyfriend erect any?"

Funny he would use those two words in the one sentence.

"I'm not feeling the spirit," I said. "And he's not my boyfriend." I thought I'd confide in him for once. I had no one else to talk to anyway. "At least I don't know if he is. I've never had a boyfriend before so I don't know..."

I wrapped my arms around myself and nibbled my lip. Brad stepped closer to me and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. A soft, almost nostalgic smile appeared on his lip as he gazed at me through gentle ocean blue eyes.

"A boyfriend should make you feel special, Penelope. He indulges you even if his heart isn't up for it at that particular moment." His fingers caressed my cheek. "He makes you laugh and he chases all your demons away. He's a guy that sends you little messages when you're apart so you know you're always on his mind. He kisses you like he can't get enough, touches you before you ask him to because he knows you want it."
His voice dropped low and his eyes fell to my lips as he traced them with the tip of his thumb.