Bessa

Darkness

Luki is trying to remove the stains on the wall.

Impossible.

"There is a lot of stains building up inside your house." Luki doesn't look at me as he cleans my anger off the wall.

"There was already stains inside here I just never realized what I wasn't seeing until now." The walls had a hard time holding their love. At times I think they bowed out wanting to explode because it's hard to contain that kind of love.

"Bessa you need to make peace with the past."

"How dare you tell me what I have to make peace with." Wanting to raise my hand to Luki's face.

"You're ruining your family; your males don't want to come home anymore. They don't want to be around you."

...a pause. Mouth opening.

"That's not true,"

"It is Bessa? Where are they now? With their father. Your pups don't want to be left alone with you anymore. Ryeson has stopped talking. Have you noticed that?"

"That's not true."

"He has, he doesn't talk anymore. He's back in diapers. You are ruining your pups. You're becoming something that I don't like. You aren't the Luna I love anymore. The pity you have for yourself is selfish. You hurt, you feel hurt. You've seen things that hurt you. But you are taking it out on the wrong wolves. Your pups have done no wrong to you, yet they are the ones to hold your hate, your wrongs on their shoulders."

There is no stopping the salty path down my cheeks. Lungs hold a tight breath, before a release of a sob. A harder wail follows.

Strong arms wrap around me; my head buries in Luki's chest as he holds me.

He holds me when I tell him what I am seeing. He rubs my back when I tell him how I can taste her in my mouth. He even sits on the floor with me, when my legs stop holding myself out.

"He told her, he doesn't know how he will ever not be inside her. He will always want his tongue, his fingers, his cock inside her all the time. He can't picture himself out of her, ever."

Luki says nothing, but his grip tightens on me.

"He called her, his light. His fucking light."

...no words from Luki. A heavy breath, he kisses the top of my head.

"He cried when he found me. He cried because he had to give her up. He cried because of me ruining them. I'm nothing but ruin to him." I'm wetting Luki's shirt, he just holds me with a rock.

Can you drown on your salty tears?

"You have not ruined my brother."

"I have. I ruined his Future by being his mate." The words are sticking thick in a throat that is crushing on the gag of truth.

"Their love was real. Not a bond."

"The love he feels for you is real."

"No, it's not. He was forced to accept me. He was forced to give her up. He didn't want to give her up. Did you know that? He didn't know how he could give her up. He was afraid he could never love me as much as he loved her."

The back door opens.

Odin, Ryeson stop. They don't want to come inside. The Savage looks at me, greens sink inside his head. There is nothing on his face but misery that mirrors my face.

"Bessa," the Savage kneels on the ground, trying to take me from Luki's arms. Clutching onto Luki not wanting to let go of something that is real. The Savage is no longer real to me. He's no longer anything to me but a face that I can't stop looking at.