Silent misery (BTS depression story)

Spring day

Namjoon p.o.v

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I sat outside listening to the sounds of nature and the city. I couldn't say I hated this but I did hate knowing that within all that sound I could never hear the sound of seokjins voice. I stared at the videos on his video camera. Him Hoseok and Jimin smiling laughing joking around. They could no longer do that. How will Hoseok feel when he wakes up to realise his beloved friend Jin is dead. 

The world seemed to silence itself and my head fell back as I stared up. I began having a flash back of his truck pulling up to the gas station. How he felt bad about leaving us. If he felt so bad about leaving the first time why'd he leave again? Something stings inside me. Did he change his mind? Does he really regret leaving so much that he leaves us again permanently? 

Did he ever even love me? I remember those nights I'd kiss him and tell him it's okay. Then he'd sigh and say that he wishes he could help everyone. Including me. How did this help us Jin? How? I'm almost mad at him for leaving but I partly can't blame him. Jimin bailed on us and life so why shouldnt he deserve a quick escape? 

Because we were still trying. It's not fair that they can leave us like this. But what can I say theirs times when I'd rather die than fight along side the others who are still alive. I think Taehyung is losing his mind. He hasn't texted me all morning hell he hasn't texted anyone and from what I hear Jungkook is still asleep so maybe Taehyung is too. 

I wonder if their a happy couple. I know they love each other. But will it be enough to keep them alive? 

Yoongi p.o.v

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I dangled my legs into the water. The water ran against my legs like the alcohol that ran down my esophagus. I could picture Jin strumming his guttiar while Jimin sings a sweet melody. I could only seem to think of these happy memories when I'm drunk off my ass. I began to stumble trying to find my way back to Jimin's grave. Once I made I sat down and smiled. "Oh Jimin I know im bad with words but I wrote you a poem." 

I sighed and recollected my thoughts so I could say the words right. "Blood is red stems are green hard to see why Im not clean when roses dies and violets ash and beloved Jin has come to pass my heart will ache and I will cry because I feel that soon another will die and if another shall come to pass maybe then I'd join you below the grass." I sighed. "I hope you liked my poem my love." I layed down and once again rubbed the pettles of Jimin's flowers. 

Taehyungs p.o.v

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I stood and looked down the tracks. I left Jungkook with a note as a final goodbye. The last thought that I'd think of is the time Jimin told me he tried to freeze himself by turning on the coldest water at first he tried to freeze to death but when that wouldn't work he tried to drown himself. I sighed stepping down. I can't live another moment in this torment. 

I can't shed another tear without feeling dead inside. I love Jungkook and he loves me. If he truley understands me he'd know why I did this. I stepped to the tracks and kneeled down placing my hands on the snow covered rail. Then my head. I stared down as a train came my way. I heard the horn of the train but I didn't move. This is the end. I saw it approach me and let out one last sigh. 

This is the end we all must face to live just to die another day. Then their was pain as I felt my bones being crushed my body being ripped apart but then it ended and their was nothing but black abyss.