I walk back into the living room and sit myself back on the sofa, smiling to myself, focusing back on the film that's playing. I look over to Imogen becoming restless on Sarah's lap. "I'll take her up to bed, Saz"
"It's okay, I'll do it" Sarah smiles and lifts her up, cradling her like a baby. I stand up and kiss Imogen on the head and whisper goodnight as Sarah walks past me. I settle back on the sofa and I feel Kimberley's eyes on me. I turn to face her and she looks away.
"What's up?" I ask her.
"Nothing"
"You sure?"
"Yeah I..erm I'm going to get going" she stutters and hastily stands up.
"But it's only 8? The film isn't finished yet?"
"I..erm..I have to erm something with work"
"Erm okay?"
"Bye" she mutters and before I can reply she's gone.
Sarah comes prancing down the stairs and into the living room shortly after the front door slammed shut. "Where's Kimbers?"
"She just upped and left..some excuse about work..she couldn't even look me in the eye and before I had chance to say bye, she'd gone"
"Well to be fair, she has just admitted having feelings for you and then had to watch yours and Mason's display of affection right in front of her"
"I suppose..aw I feel really bad now"
"She'll get over it, she'll be fine, she probably just found it a bit awkward, that's all"
"I suppose so, you're probably right"
"Of course I am, I'm Sarah" She winks at me.
"Whatever Saz" I laugh. "Anyways how are things going with Will?"
"Good, we've got a meeting next week"
"Really?"
"Really! I'm nervous but so excited"
"You deserve this so much, I'm so happy for you"
"Thank you babe"
* * *
Kimberley's POV
I find myself in a club not far from Cheryl's, I make my way through the hot, sweating dancing bodies around me in the loud, full, rowdy room. The pumping music is ringing in my ears, the air is thick, hot and sticky, no fresh air making it hard to breathe. I get to the bar, in hope of drinking away my sorrows.
"Vodka tonic please" I ask the barman and he fetches my drink, I pay him and find an empty booth to sit in.
I hated having to watch Mason and Cheryl's display of affection right in front of me. I felt like my heart had been ripped out. I had no right to feel that way. We're not together. She doesn't feel the same way and I've done nothing but make an utter fool of myself. I wish I could go back in time and stop us sleeping together the first time and we probably wouldn't be in this mess.
I down drink after drink, shot after shot and now I'm sat in a booth in the corner of the club with a glass of wine. This is gonna hurt in the morning, raging hangover heading my way.
"Hey, fancy some company beautiful?" A tall, relatively good looking man approaches me.
"Sure" I find myself nodding and smiling. I guess I could do with some attention.
"Would you like another drink?" He asks, noticing my near empty glass of wine.
I nod, "vodka and coke please" I say, deciding to switch back to vodka. Normally I wouldn't have trusted a stranger to get my drink, I'd of got it myself or gone to the bar to get it with them but right now I was too drunk to care.
"Here you go"
"Cheers" I smile slightly, immediately taking a gulp of my drink.
"So what's a beautiful girl doing sat her alone?" He asks. Oh here we go.
"Drowning my sorrows" I reply bluntly, taking a large gulp of my drink.
"How come?"
"Doesn't matter" I tell him. I can't be arsed explaining the whole thing to anyone never mind a stranger. "How about you?"
"Needed a night out" he replies simply.
"Cool. I need another drink" I say, getting up. "Want one?"
"Sure"
I walk to the bar and order my drink, his drink and some shots. Only the it's come to my attention that I don't even know his name. I make a mental note to ask once I get back.
"Shots as well?" He asks.
"Don't see why not"
"Cool, three for you, three for me?"
"Okay" I say sitting back down where I was previously sat. "What's your name by the way?"
"Jack"
"Kim" I told him. I don't think he knows who I am or if he does, he doesn't show it and isn't fazed by it.
"On three..one..two..three" he says, grasping a shot glass, as soon as he says three I'm downing the shots letting the cold, colourful, tangy liquids of each shot sear down my throat.
"Not bad, Kim, more shots?"
"No thanks"
"Go on, few more?"
"Go on then" I find myself agreeing and he returns with twelve shots shortly after. He sits down and lines them up in front of us. Six for me and six for him. "Woah..I'll just stick to three" I slur.
"No come on, Kim, you know you want to" he chuckles. I find myself agreeing, too drunk to care, drowning my sorrows like I said so why should I care, three more shots aren't going to make a difference.
"Let's go" I shout and we pick up the shots downing them one by one, allowing the liquid to burn our throats, all of different flavours.
*
I am well and truly drunk now, I can just about keep my balance. Jack is talking to me but I'm not really paying any attention.
"Let's go back to mine" I hear him say, snapping me out my drunken daze. I nod and he helps me up. We stumble out of the club and walk a short way back to his. I feel delirious and I'm not really sure of what's happening. I'm too drunk. I feel like my mind is clouded and I can't focus on anything. I'm unaware of the situation and I'm not sure how I'm feeling. I don't do things like this. Kimberley Walsh doesn't do this. This is not me. The next thing I know is that I'm in his bed and he's taking my top off and undoing my jeans. He's already naked on top of me. I don't want this. I want it to stop but I'm too drunk to think straight so I let him. I don't try to stop him, I'm not enjoying this. He's kissing me roughly as tears run down my cheeks, he doesn't notice. He's just as drunk as I am. We're both to blame for this mess. It's not against my will because I'm not stopping him. Part of me hates this and wants it to stop and the other part of me wants it, wants to feel loved even if it is in a rough, rushed way with no love actually involved, just to feel wanted. This is wrong but I can't bring myself to stop it. I cry but I continue. I'm having drunken sex with a man I've just met, I don't know him, he doesn't know me. It doesn't mean anything. This isn't me. I'm not that type of person and I don't think of the consequences that may occur afterwards.
______
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