Fatal Attractions

XXXVII

I dreamt they were dead.

Both of them.

Jason had the wires on the machines cut, and Logan got shot, as if my infidelity killed them.

I woke up sweating alcohol and clinging to the sheets next to me, my heart pumping even faster when I found no one next to me.

I shot up and looked around frantically, feeling a hand on my arm.

I looked down and saw Logan face down on the bed, drool dripping out of his mouth as his fingers trailed down my arm. "What's wrong?" He mumbled.

I took a sigh of relief and laid down next to him, a headache pounding in my temples. "Bad dream." I muttered in a dry voice, scooting closer to him.

"What time is it?" He moaned, his hand groping for his phone.

I glanced over at the clock next to him, seeing it was nine o'clock.

"You've got to go to work." He yawned, getting up, a big red mark on his face from where the pillow was.

"I'll call in sick." I muttered, grabbing his hand to draw him back to bed.

He turned to look at me but the sun stabbed him in the eye through the slits in the blinds, his eyes squinting in annoyance. "Alright, five more minutes."

I smiled as he flopped down on the bed next to me, putting an arm around my shoulders.

"You're not mad at me." He said carefully, trying not to jinx it, like a fugitive telling a cop their crimes in hope that they wouldn't remember.

I sighed, closing my eyes and nuzzling my face into his neck. "Not yet at least." I was honestly too tired to be mad at him. Despite what he said, I remembered every moment of last night, even though I was terribly drunk.

He pressed his lips to my head. "You should visit him today." He whispered softly.

I shook my head. "Not yet."

"Madisyn, in thirty four hours they are going to take him off the machines."

I looked up at him. "Not on my watch they aren't."

He pressed his lips together. "Madisyn, my dad is a doctor. He has to deliver tough news a lot, and he tells everyone to wait forty eight hours after a big surgery, just so they can have some hope, pray, do whatever shit they wanted before their loved one died. Nine out of his ten critical patients didn't survive past those forty eight hours. It's not an estimate, it's an ultimatum. From what I learned from him, even if he does wake up, Jason's injuries are going to require a long and painful recovery time. Don't make him suffer."

I rested my cheek on his shoulder, looking down at our entangled legs. "He can't die yet, he just can't. I'm still trying to figure everything out, I'm still trying to decide whether or not to keep the ring. I have to have hope that he will be the one out of ten that will survive."

He sighed, stroking the side of my arm. He was silent for a while as he did this, holding something back when he finally said "People. That's your weakness, Madisyn. Your weakness is trying to save everybody, and you can't do that."

I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. I hadn't realized that until now. Why was he always right? How did he know me better than I knew me? "I know." I said quietly.

We laid there for a few more minutes, protesting getting out of bed. If I could just lay here forever, I would be happy.

Our peace was quickly ended when I heard the front door open.

We both shot up, listening as the door closed and light footsteps echoed through the house.

"Madisyn? You home?" Aubrey's voice paralyzed my body despite my heart going haywire.