What if I was nothing (Tommy Conlon fanfiction)

Part 14

I woke up later that night, we were lying in Tommy's bed, my head on his shoulder. He breathed calmly, regularly, I could hear his heartbeat. It took me few seconds to realize, that he is rubbing my back.
I smiled and kissed his neck.
"Sorry, I didn't want to wake you up," he whispered.
"You didn't, I think. You can't sleep?"
"No," he exhaled deeply.
"Tommy, come on, tell me what's bothering you?"
"I don't..."
"Please, we are couple, aren't we? And whatever is going we are in that together," I insisted.
He was quiet for what felt like eternity. Then he said: "They are sending me back. I have to go on another tour in Iraq."
I thought, that the room in the middle of the night couldn't get any darker. But it did.
"When?" I asked him, even thought I didn't want to know at all. Counting days, what is worse?
"Well, they said as soon as possible. Which, according to my experiences from last tour, means not more than two weeks."
I almost couldn't breathe, I wanted to cry so so bad.
"We'll talk about it in the morning, hmmm?" I said in the calmest and the sweetest voice, that I could create in that moment.
After like an hour, when Tommy was sleeping, I got out of the bed and went to the living room, sat on a sofa and with my face buried in hands I started to cry.
I mean why. Why some people can be happy their whole life and the others are like doomed or what? Constantly falling down, crawling from the bottom and the minute they reach the top and it seems they can be happy too, they have to fall down again. And again...

"Shani," I heard Tommy behind me.
"I thought you were sleeping," I wiped tears, but I started to cry again.
"I'm sorry, I wanted to be strong and I don't know, cool about it. Be supportive, all I can think about is that just when I've found you, I am loosing you."
"You're not loosing me. I'll be gone for few months. It will be just like a blink of an eye in the end, you'll see. You won't even notice, that I was away," he took me to his arms.
"Why you? Why they can't choose somebody else?" I sobbed quietly.
"Because I am the best," he chuckled and I had to laugh. "Come to bed, we have a big dat today, I want you to be rested, hmm?"
"Big day?" I looked at him.
"You'll see," he kissed me and he carried me back to his room.

"So, where are we going?" I asked him later that day, after the school, when we were walking hand in hand across the city.
"Well, when I met an old friend, when I was on a tournament in LA. He lives here, with his wife and they are expecting their first child. And because of that, they are leaving their old apartment and they are looking for new leaseholder."
"Oh, wow," I exclaimed. "You're serious? That is awesome!"
And it was better than I expected. Just a block away from my work place. It was an old apartment. We got in and a smiling couple invited us in.
"Hey, Tommy, come inside. You must be Shani," lovely woman with a big belly shook my hand.
"Feel free to ask about anything, look everywhere, like home," she said.
We came inside then and I saw a short hall leading straight to the kitchen counter. No place for a table, but I can survive that. On the right side in the hall two doors. First a bathroom, my soul screamed from happiness, when I saw a bath. Second door toilet room.
In the kitchen another door leading to next room. Woman opened them, followed by her husband, we all entered and I almost exclaimed from a joy. It was a huge room, already empty. Such a huge space! In my mind I have already seen, where I'd place bed, kitchen table, closet, sofa. And oh my God, this place has also a balcony?
"I will never be able to afford a place like this," I said, what I thought out loud and Tommy, with his friends looked at me.
"You excuse us?" Tommy smiled at them and he took me to the kitchen.
"It's... Amazing here, but..."
"Take it, I'll help you. I have money from the tournament," he interrupted me.
"But..."
"Don't make me persuade you. You like it here, don't you?"
"I love it here," I smiled.
"So?" he took me in his arms.
"Alright, I'll take it," I said happily and he kissed me avidly.

"You're gonna love it here," woman said, when se gave me a keys and a lease next day. "If anything is wrong, just call me or my husband, okay?"

And that's it. My new apartment, my own place to live. New chapter of my life. I looked at Tommy and he gave me that wide happy eyes shining unique smile.
"So, first night in your new apartment?" he asked. "Does the offer with sleepover still stand?"
"What? It's so cold here!" I chuckled.
"Don't worry, I'll keep you warm," he began to kiss me and took my clothes down.

I have no idea how much time we have left, but I decided not to spend it by sobbing in the corner. We'll make every minute unforgetable, as long as we have each other we don't need anything else.