Suicidal Dreams

SAFE

Soon we'd be dead men walking. Whatever this is, whatever we've become is not us anymore. I don't believe whatever this is.

"Come on!"

I shoved Kobra off of me, "leave me alone Kobra."

"What difference will that make!" He shouted at me in anger. By this point he was smiling at how frustrating this was getting for him.

"The difference is that you'll be able to think rationally!"

He blew out a huff of air as he stormed out the diner. He talked to himself, probably bitching about this, then he left in the Trans Am.

Party Poison walked out of the rooms and claimed his seat across from me. His vacant expression was replaced with a more gentle- worried expression. The tone of his voice crushed me because it was genuine, very much like melted chocolate.

"As your big brother I want you to tell me what happened while we were gone. Your guys arguments go back to him going without a goodbye."

His hand was placed on top of me for a signal of trust between us. It felt low of me to tell him what happened rather than his brother, my husband.

"I had a moment of discomposure and what Im about to tell you needs to stay between us."

I instantly regretted even opening my mouth in the first place, it became unbearable thinking about my choices.

"Your brother married the wrong woman."

Tears brimmed my eyes from vision, "I had an affair."

His face dropped but continued to coax me in what I was trying to say. It took me a while to even fill him in how it happened. He furrowed his eyebrows when I mentioned something.

"You're upset it was just sex?"

I nodded my head slowly, "if I had fallen in love it would be easier for Kobra. I had sex, just sex while my husband was still alive!"

Party made an oh-face expression.

"You thought he was dead and others told you he was."

"That doesn't justify the fact I did it with it Val!"

He got up abruptly and let out a dry laugh.

"I'm going to kill him! And you! Both of you!"

I shook my head, tears spilling more from my eyes. While Party was losing his mind I tried to stop my crying.

"You don't plan on telling him? If you don't then you definitely need Val to back the fuck off because he has a mouth!" He shouted at me.

Will he find out?

Will he?

Will he?

Will he?

Will he run away?

...

My combat boots crunched the hard desert sand as I walked over it. It notified those inside my base that I had arrived after days of "working."

The first one to come greet me was Missile Kid. She ran into my arms so I could gracefully pick her up to embrace her better.

"I have some news for you baby."

I sat her down on my couch so I could let her know about the two brothers. She sat on the couch patiently for me to tell her what I wanted to say.

"Whispers in the night," I hummed softly when I got an idea.

"Before I tell you, can you please get my journal?"

She did as I told and pranced to our room for the rubbishy journal. She came back with it in hand along with a pen. I quickly jotted down my idea while of thinking of a way to tell Missile.

"How would you feel if we saw Kobra and Patry again?"

Her head tilted to the right a bit, thinking of an answer to give me but, remained silent.

"It would be difficult."

I gave her a small nod to let her know I was paying attention to her, "what if I say they want to see you?"

"Impossible dead people can't see! Can they?"

I shook my head.

"No but, people who are alive can."

It took her a few moments to understand what I was really trying to say. When she finally grasped the thought of her two lovely care takers she freaked out, shouting in glee.

"I didn't kill them!" She laughed out with such happiness.

It hurt me to know she couldn't be all happy because her other two care takers didn't make it.

"When can I see them?"

"For now- not soon. We need them to be hidden and separated from you so BL/ind doesn't suspect anything. I'll send you everything they want to tell you."

Her face dropped a bit but returned to its formal happy face.

"Tell Party I want his jacket," she smirked.

I laughed in surprise when she understood her advantage in this situation. Party Poison and Kobra Kid already treated her with such care but now they will basically treat her as a queen.
A motorbaby queen of our small rebellious team.

"Kick ass!"

We laughed in joy when we joked more about the two boys. Having to occasionally take a break because we couldn't breath. It felt right to have Missile Kid having a good time after so many sleepless nights of excruciating pain.