Written; In the Life of Myla Renee

Chapter 17; Bamma

Chapter 17;

[A/N: My Inspiration for this chapter, is 
Rather Die Young - Beyonce
Cheer Up - J. Cole, 
Far Away - Tyga, 
All back - Chris Brown, 
Heart attack - Trey Songz 
Fool in love - Rihanna
Gone &never coming back - Melanie Fiona 
Unforgivable Blackness - Diggy 
Those songs helped me write this chapter. Enjoy! &For the record; I never said she died. I said she was GONE. Y'all really gotta pay more attention & Stop assuming. *EP Hudson voice*

-Miranda;

**I'm alive? I'm alive! Ugh... I'm alive. Who hates me enough to save my life? I obviously wanted to die. I was in a room with yellow walls and a grey carpet. Cameron. Why? Why, Cameron why? I got up & ran downstairs, into the kitchen. There were no knives in here.

Cameron: What are you doing? 

Me: Looking for a knife!

**He stared at me. Then grabbed me & put me over his shoulder. He carried me upstairs & sat me on the bed.

Cameron: Miranda. Sit there and don't move! What the fuck is wrong with you?  

Me: I don't wanna live anymore, Cameron. I want to die! 

Cameron: Why would you want to die?  

Me: Because! Jawan hates me! Everyone hates me! 

Cameron: Miranda. I don't hate you. I've never hated you. No one could ever hate you, alright? Jawan is just mad right now. Give him some time.  

Me: Cameron. I'm sorry. I just- I can't do this anymore! 

Cameron: You can't or you won't?

**I just stared up at him.

Cameron: You don't know how much it scared me to find you laying on the floor yesterday! You really drugged yourself?! REALLY??? I saved your life yesterday! If I woulda gotten there 5 seconds later you would've died. I checked you out of the hospital this morning after you tried to pull the plug on yourself! That's why you're here. I didn't even SLEEP last night! I went through all of that to keep you alive and you want to KILL YOURSELF?!

**I looked at him, then at the floor. He left the room & came back.

Cameron: If you really wanna die, here. Just don't ask me to watch.

**He put a knife in my hand & walked out of the room. I started twirling the knife in my hand. I held it to my stomach & sat there. What am I doing? I ran downstairs & hugged Cameron.

Me: I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. 

Cameron: It's alright.

**I don't know what I would do without Cameron, man. I really gotta thank Sienna for introducing me to him. He's helped me so much!

Cameron: Now, come here. I got someone here to see you. 

Me: Right now? I look a mess! 

Cameron: It doesn't matter.

**He took my hand & we started walking into the living room but, I stopped him halfway there.

Me: Cameron. I really don't wanna see anyone. I'd rather just go back to bed. 

Cameron: C'mon. This will cheer you up.

**I walked with him into the living room & saw Shontelle, Myla, Leona & Claire sitting there.

Claire: She- umm... She begged us to bring her over here.

**Myla was staring at me with her big brown eyes. The same way she did the day I left.