Part 2 of "In The Woods When First We Met"

202. Anne Fails, and Diana Talks Some Sense Into Gilbert

               

(As you can see, I struggle with making up titles for the chapters.)

On Thursday morning, Anne got out of the Cuthbert's buggy and entered the schoolhouse with the intention of asking Gilbert to come over to Green Gables to study with her.

She and Gilbert had talked to each other about difficult things, adult things, things that were embarrassing and painful- and they had spoken of their love for one another.

And in Anne's eyes, her pushing him away was because of her love for him- she didn't want Gilbert to enter into a marriage with no possibility of doing what every married man did, what every man would expect out of marriage.

In pushing him away, in releasing him out into the world to find a woman who could do the things that Anne could not do, she thought she was doing right by him. She had never considered that she was making a decision about his future for him. She thought about what Emily had said all night and woken up with the conclusion that she had to tell him how she felt, and then give him the choice- she couldn't choose for him.

Gilbert wasn't in school yet when she arrived, but she waited for him, growing more and more nervous, while Ruby prattled on about her walk home with Moody yesterday afternoon. When Gilbert finally came in, Anne jumped up and abandoned Ruby mid-sentence.

"Gilbert," she said quickly.

"Anne." He smiled at her- like a sunrise, was the phrase forever in her mind- before he quickly tried to act as if he wasn't too terribly excited to see her.

"I wondered if you..."

"Yeah?" Gilbert asked.

"Um. I was having trouble with some of the math and I wondered if you might come over after school and we could work on it together..." she trailed off. She was not having trouble with the math, but she hoped that if she made it sound like she really needed him, he wouldn't say no.

"Yeah," he said eagerly, but then shrugged and repeated, "Yeah, sure. If you need help."

"Okay...great. Well, I'll see you after school, then."

"Wait, Anne- aren't the Cuthberts' picking you up after school?" Gilbert asked.

"Oh. Right. Well, you could ride with us," Anne said. "Or I can tell them to go on ahead, if you want us to walk together..."

Gilbert would love to walk with her on the way home, but he thought about how they'd pass through the woods, and he feared that if Anne was already uncomfortable with him moving in too quickly on her, then being alone together in the very woods she was attacked in, would not make her feel any safer.

"No, uh..." he thought a moment, then said: "I'll go on home to help my dad first, and then I'll drive over to Green Gables. Is that all right?"

"Sure," Anne said. "I'd like that." She managed a smile, and then turned away quickly to go back to her girlfriends.

---

All day long, Anne felt nervous about Gilbert coming over.

Stop this, she told herself. It's ridiculous. No, it's preposterous! He's practically been your best friend and you've told him all kinds of things, don't chicken out now.

---

Back at home, Anne waited anxiously by the front door, peering out, hoping to see Gilbert drive up to their farm.