PurplePhone /Jeremike Oneshots and Prefrences

Jeremike - "The Squip Enters"

Jeremy was walking next to his friend Christine and her friend she met up at the mall with, Jake. While he walked beside them, tuning in and out of their conversation, he wondered how Christine said yes to meeting him at the mall.

A couple of days before, Jeremy timidly walked down the hallway of his school, avoiding any eye contact at all, trying to get to his class. On the way, he heard a popular girl at school, Chloe Valentine gossiping to her friend, Brooke Lohst.
"So Jenna Rolan said Madeline told Jake, "I'll only have sex with you if you beat me at pool", and then she lost at pool, deliberately!"
"That is so awesome," Brooke said in awe.
"Brooke!" Chloe exclaimed.
"I-I mean slutty." Jenna Rolan, the girl who knows everything about everyone, continued the conversation to Chloe's dismay.
"And then, Madeline was all like-"
"I'm telling the story Jenna!" Chloe interrupted. The three girls then turned to Jeremy who was awkwardly standing there, listening in on the conversation. Jeremy already was an outcast in the school, and with a small boner from waiting for his porno to load early this morning, it's safe to say that his social status was staying where it was. "He's like totally getting off on that." Chloe walked off, disgusted with her posse. A few more feet down the hall, Rich was talking to Jake. Apparently, sex was more important than actual academics, so Rich asked Jake about what happened with him and Madeline. Jake was the perfect high school guy. Popular, cool, and people say he's straight up "awesomeness personified".
"Yo, Jakey-D! So what's the story with Madeline?" Jake smirked.
"Oh man, I shouldn't say...But it's a good thing I rock at pool." Jeremy rolled his eyes and continued walking down the hall.

Jake and Christine weren't a good match. They didn't seem compatible at all.
"What do you think, Jeremy?" Christine interrupted his deep thinking state.
"H-Huh? Wh-?"
"I was asking if you were also happy that Jake joined the play?" Jeremy absentmindedly nodded. He couldn't focus on anything that was going on. His head was starting to pound. Ever since he took that weird pill that Rich told him to get, along with the Mountain Dew Red that Michael, his closest friend, supplied, he hasn't been thinking straight, in more ways than one. All of a sudden, his headache immediately magnified itself without warning.
"Ow," Jeremy said to himself.
"Target female: inaccessible," A voice in his head commented.
"Uh, what the hell?!" Jeremy started to look around. No one was talking to him, and the pain was staring to move to other parts of his body.
"Calibration in process, please excuse some mild discomfort." The voice was so calm, but the pain was so frightening.
"Mild?!" Jeremy lowered himself to the floor and curled up into the fetal position. He felt like he was melting from the pain that was killing him from the inside out.
"Jeremy, what's going on?" Christine tried to lower down and help him, but he shot up and brushed himself off.
"N-Nothing. I'm fine, I just n-"
"Calibration increased. Access procedure initiated. Discomfort level may increase." His pain in his head came back, following by pain in his chest, and then concluded with excruciating pain through the rest of his body. The voice in his head began listing off things that sounded so foreign to poor Jeremy who was now on the floor convulsing in pain.
"Accessing neural memory, accessing muscle memory. Access procedure complete," The pain slowly evaporated from Jeremy's body. In front of him stood a handsome male with blue eyes, a black tux with a neon blue tie, and weird neon blue veins that looked kind of like wires, showing on random parts of his face and neck. "Jeremy Fitzgerald, welcome to your Super Quantum Unit Intel Processor. Your SQUIP."
Oh boy.

(I know I directly quoted two songs from Be More Chill, More than Survive, and The SQUIP Enters. I'd feel bad if I didn't say that because I don't want anyone thinking I own any of this dialogue or something, even though that's might be a huge stretch.)