Always is not. Every day is.

chapter 27

RYLE POV:

A week has been passed since layken is admitted in the hospital. She hasn't opened her eyes yet and every time I look at her still body, her hands connected with so many tubes, her face covered with bandages and her beautiful eyes closed my heart aches, my heart cry louder and louder. And I regret so much each time. I should have talked to her that day instead of breaking her fragile heart. I should have hugged her tight after hearing her real story that seemed unreal to me at first. I shouldn't have been a jerk. But then I think that maybe it was meant to be like this.

If I wouldn't have insulted her like this I wouldn't search for her everywhere and wouldn't be able to find her and see things with my own eyes. Perhaps all this happened for the sake of me and layken. Maybe there is a reason behind this.

I haven't left layken's side at all in the hospital except a few times when I was supposed to meet Luke and Devan for the documentation stuff but I preferred having a talk with them on the phone call because I didn't want to miss the chance of layken opening her eyes. I want to be the first one she see when she open her eyes because I want her to know that that side of Ryle that she saw that day was that face that once belonged to me but now I have changed. And as much as it seems strange or surprising I will say that she is one of the reason behind it.

And here I am sitting by Jule's grave. I wanted to take out everything that I had been keeping inside me. I know that I have Ridge by my side. I know that he listen to me every time. I know that he is just like a brother and a best friend to me but I wanted to have someone else and so Jule was the only person I could think of.

Although she is no more in this world but I know this thing for sure that she is concerned about layken. She is her mother of course and nothing can change it not even this inevitable fact that she has been taken worlds apart from her daughter.

Approximately one whole hour has been passed since I am here. I opened my heart to her and told her everything from the beginning and this thought is surprising me that I can feel a huge boulder being lifted up from my chest that has been there since a very long time.

I am in the middle of my sentence when my phone ring. I quickly pick it up. "Where are you mayn!" it's Ridge of course.

"Nowhere. Just finding something for distraction." I reply hiding the fact that I am here sitting by her grave. "Okay well fine. Just wanted to know where you are." He say.

I suddenly remember Allon. Oh my! She has been going through so much. First this layken incident and then her uncle. The other night when layken was taken to the hospital Allon received a call and she came to know that her uncle passed away. As far as I know she only had him and now he too is no more in this world. this departing news of her uncle made her even more sad and not only this but she is also worried about where will she stay. I heard her talking to Ridge that her uncle used to deal with her house hold expenses and now she has no idea for how will she pay all the rent and the utility bills.

Reminded of Allon I ask Ridge, "what about Allon, where is she? And is she okay?"

"Actually Ryle I have decided something. Allon is so worried about where she will stay so I have decided that I am asking her to move in with me."

"Wait What? You have decided to ask Allon about this?"

"Why? Will it not be okay?" he sound so serious and so I release my laughter.

"Ryle? I am so confused and you are laughing. I hate you so much. Instead of giving me an advice you are laughing. Real shit."

"God Ridge. You love her right?"

This leave him silent.

When he doesn't reply so I say more clearly even though I know that he heard me already before, "right?"

But then he finally reply, "yes Ryle yes! I love her so much. I haven't been on a date with her yet, I haven't slept with her yet, I haven't even spent months with her but I am definitely so sure about this feeling growing inside me that I am in this holy fucking love with her. Her eyes, her presence, her slightest touch or less over her slightest glance traps me in her Ryle. I haven't experienced anything like such but I know that I am in love with her." I know he is smiling on the other end of the call and this make me smile too. I am so happy for him.

"Okay. Guess what I knew this thing from the second you were staring at her from the side mirror when we were driving to layken's place and before that when you were staring at her in the living room that same day. As much as you seem to think that I wasn't noticing. I did. But she will be hard on you so now it's you who should know how to deal with her."

"Yeah! I know." He sigh. "I am ending the call now. Come back soon when you are done with your distracting thing."

With this he end up the call.

I say my final words to Jule. "I know you are somewhere here and you are watching Layken but I even know that as much as you try to keep her safe you cannot. It isn't your fault but I promise that from now onwards I will keep her safe. I will try to give her every happiness of this world. I will wipe her tears that aren't made for her. I will treat her the way she deserve to be treated. I promise this, jule." I keep the third rose on her coffin and make my way towards my car telling pat to drive me to the hospital.

When I reach the hospital I text Ridge for where is he and second later a reply came reading that he is in the canteen with Allon showing her thousand reasons for why she should move in with her and this make me laugh a bit but as soon as I see layken's room my laughter fades. I open the door and walk inside sitting on the stool beside her bed.

She is still sleeping, her long eyelashes are touching her cheeks and even with so many scars on her face she is looking so beautiful. Both her hands are rested by her side and I take her right hand in my hand. As soon as my fingers touch her I feel a current of electricity going up my spine. I trace her bruises on her hand lightly as I say "layken. I want you to open your eyes. I want those beautiful eyes of yours on me. I want to see that curve on your lips. I want to know for how you look when you smile. I want to hear your voice because I have heard so little of it. I want to hear you laugh and see the way it can affect me. I want you to come back layken." I tighten my grip on her hand. "I am sorry about the way I treated you. I am sorry about those cruel words that I hit you with but I don't regret it at all because if it wouldn't have happened the way it did I wouldn't have find you. Please come back layken." With this I rest my head on her palm and lose my attempts to hold back my tears and I don't give a second try neither I hesitate as my tears drop on her palm.

After few seconds I feel a slight motion of her hand but maybe I simply wondered so I don't lift my head up but then when after a minute her hand move slightly again I look up immediately and then I see her trying to open her eyes as a painful moan escapes her mouth. I hold her hand more tightly and with this action her eyes opens and a soon as she see me she bring her hands back towards my cheek to touch me like she tried to do and I move a little closer.

As soon as her hand comes in contact with my cheek I say "layken" and she calls my name "Ryle" the way I haven't heard before.

She caress my cheek with her little fingers and then the tears starts to roll down her cheeks wetting her gown. I quickly get up from the stool moving closer to her as I say "hey! Shshsh! Its okay don't cry." She move a little left allowing me to get on the bed with her and I do it that way shifting comfortably beside her as I lay and then in a matter of micro second she keep her head on my chest and I hear her cry. I lower my hands on her back and hold her in my arm allowing her to get rid of every tear trapped inside her.

I'll hold her like she is my universe. Forever.