Always is not. Every day is.

chapter 9

The dazzling sunlight enters through my bedroom window and illuminates my face. Today you can see no lines of dried up tears around my cheeks, nor puffy eyes. You touch my pillow it isn't wet. Neither is my head heavy nor my nose blocked. I slept last night without giving myself a new scar that's why my bed sheet is unstained. Isn't this morning different? Different from the last every morning I've experienced.

'What makes it like chalk and cheese', my inner voice refutes out of curiosity.

I wonder what happened last night that was unusual and that brings me to open my eyes to a new morning that's actually uplifting. Maybe because I haven't seen my father-by-name yesterday. But no there were a lot of days where I didn't see my father- by- name but still I couldn't sleep peaceful. Even in his absence he was all over me with his dirt. Maybe because Ryle in his recent interview said that he will be doing his first concert soon and even when I know that I won't be able to go there I still have hopes and maybe where there are hopes there is happiness.

'No Layken your morning is different because of some big reason you're forgetting', my heart alleged.

'Huh......what else', I wonder.

Well whatever the reason the best possible outcome is I am happy. I got more than ten hours of peaceful sleep last night. If no dreams then no nightmares too. So here this bleak barren and apathetic girl is smiling. The girl who doesn't know what her day ahead would be like. Maybe she will be forced into dirt just after she comes out of shower. Maybe her mother will break this news that she has to stay at a client's house for the night shift and as usual she has to sleep with her father-by-name. Or the worst of all maybe Allon would never show up again because there is nothing hidden from her now.

'Layken.......don't over think please ', my mind plead.

Oh Allon............yes she is the reason for my uplifting morning today. I open my heart in front of her yesterday and now my shattered heart feel compose. Can I love this girl anymore for all this. But if she...........

No I don't even want to think the other way round because even the idea of losing her is bloodcurdling. No.....I won't let that bitch leave me this soon. With this idea I get up from my bed. Stretch a little. The pendulum of the clock stroked hard. Oh gosh it is 12:00 in the afternoon. Did I sleep this long? I even missed my university today. Oh no worries It was just Mr Bullhead's one of the most boring extra classes and only because I didn't see that rude bullhead today I have more chances that my day ahead will be less wretched. I reach my nightstand and pick up my phone.

Allon's 57 missed calls. Oh gosh this girl is driving me crazy now. I dialled her back. After listening to her freaking crazy waiting ringtone for about 5 minutes I get to hear her furious voice

'GO TO HELL BITCH', she yell over the phone

M phone topples over. Oh God why is my girl so insane? Only because I am not a phone addict person I didn't mind that big screech crash on my brand new IPhone. I pick it up my pop socket and yelled back

'You bitch bastard don't yell at me, I am not your dog nose boyfriend. Yell at him'

'Bitch don't call him dog nose. He's hot. Oh by the way don't get jealous of his nose. It makes him look like Prince Charming'

'Oh I never knew did Prince Charming look this ghastly? I wonder then why do girls always wait for their price Charming. This is surely a medical emergency'.

'Layken he's hot. Stop making fun of him'

I tried controlling my laughter but fail.

'Oh Allon's dog nosed pussy cat is hot AF....Okay?'