denial » pyrocynical

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-about 3 days later-

NIALL'S POV

taking remy to the hospital was hard. she was a mess, physically and emotionally. we're both still really struggling, remy hasn't talked once since the incident.

however, we found a house in LA that we really like, which is the only happy ending to our california trip. i'm glad to be home.

"remy, love-" i opened her bedroom door slowly, she was sound asleep. that's all she's done since we got back.

she was snoring lightly, her mouth open slightly like it always is. i crawled under the covers and engulfed her in my arms. her eyes blinked open, and she stared at me for a second.

"hey- sorry. i didn't mean to wake you up." i told her, stroking her hair with my hand. she sighed heavily, closing her eyes and curling up into my chest.

"rem- you haven't talked in three days, you're worrying me." she opened her eyes once again and looked up at me, i noticed how watery they were. she let out a soft sniffle, it sounded like she was choking on her tears already.

"hey, hey- shhh, it's alright princess." i began to hush her, hoping to calm her down. she nodded, still choking on those tears.

"it hurts so much." remy whispered.

"i know it does. we'll get through this, i promise."

she held out her pinky. "pinky swear?"

i linked mine with hers. "pinky swear."

she put her hand on my cheek and leaned up, planting a soft kiss on my lips. she hasn't done that in what feels like forever.

"i've got a question, though." i began.

"what is it?"

i sighed a bit, hesitating at first. "Dr. Wilson said we could start trying for a baby again in a few months, do you... I dunno... wanna try this time?"

her lips curled up at the ends, making her dimples visible.

"i think i do, are you sure we're ready, though? i mean... i'm only 21, niall."

she was right, we were both insanely young for children, but after losing our first one... i don't think i've ever wanted anything more.

"i know, i know... but i think we could handle it. i've never raised a kid, hell, i know absolutely nothing about raising one, but it's something i think i'm ready for. i wanna be with you for a long ass time, rem, preferably forever."

her dimples came back again.

"i want that too, i'm just really scared... i don't even have a real job yet." her voice became weak again.

"we'll figure it out, we always do." i reassured her, moving a piece of hair and tucking it behind her ear.

"we got this."