Girl on wheels

Nine

I woke up to the sound of the front door closing. "Hey." I say sleepily, pushing myself up and moving my legs around. "Hey sweetie." My mum says planting a kiss on my cheek before wandering off to the kitchen. Where's James then? I check my phone and there was nothing. No texts. No calls. Absolutely nothing. I transferred to my chair with more difficulty this time as I was sleepy and out of spoons still. I needed to get to my room where I could call James in private and not have my mum listen in on me. I was rushing and was pretty much half in my chair when i started wheeling to my room so I could call James to check he was okay when I near enough fell out of my chair yet again. Fuck this. I just dragged myself to my room in the end, I didn't have the energy and I needed to know where James was.

As I pushed the door open I saw James sat at my desk with one of my books open. I let out a huge sigh as I stopped holding myself up with my arms and let myself flop fully to the floor this time. "Are you okay?" James asks getting up from my desk. "Does it look like it? You're such a dick you know that." I reply giving him the finger. I flip myself over and lay there trying to find the energy I need to go get my chair and get in it again. James lays down beside me on the floor and we just stay quiet for a while.

I could feel myself drifting off again to sleep when I hear James get up from beside me and wrap his arms around my body and life me up. "What are you doing dick?" I say sleepily. Still kinda mad at him. "Shhhh. I'm putting you in bed." He whispers while I feel him begin walking. He manages to hold me with one arm as he pulls back my duvet before putting me in my bed and covering me up. "Thanks dick." I reply arranging my legs to be comfy. "Anytime." He says as I hear him walk out my room. He comes back in with my chair, I know this because I heard it coming not because my eyes were open. Because trust me I was so close to being dead to the world. He puts it next to my bed and I hear him go back to the desk and continue what he was doing. It was then that I fell into a deep sleep.

I had woken up in the middle of the night because someone was snoring next to me. And yes it was James, and no he wasn't sleeping beside me. He was asleep on my sofa which was positioned near enough right next to my bed. I couldn't find my music and then suddenly remembered it was in my school bag which, was by the front door. "James." I whispered after a while, now getting fed up of listening to him snoring. He groaned a little before I repeated his name and he shot up from the sofa. "Can you get my music. It's in my school bag. Pleaseeee." I say looking at his sleepy face. He nods and walks out my room, returning a few seconds later with my music. He hands it to me and goes to lay back down on the sofa. "Sleep here for gods sake. I have not forgiven you yet. You're still a dick but you'll get cold on the sofa. Come sleep here." I reply patting the spot next to me. I had a double bed so I could have more room but I only usually stayed in one spot at night. He shrugged and sleepily climbed in beside me. He had gotten cosy in the duvet and he had turned over so his back was facing me and he fell asleep within seconds. This I could tell because he started snoring again. I sighed and put my headphones on, choosing some music to fall asleep to. In the end I chose some of that good ol Ed Sheeran. Just as I was about to drift off James rolled over and took my hand in his. I stayed still as my heart started beating fast and I began sweating. Why am I anxious now for Jesus' sake. I took some deep breaths and James rolled back over again, letting go of my hand. The anxiety passed and I was able to finally get back to sleep. According to my clock on my walk which was lit up by my fairy lights it was around one in the morning. Why did you wake him up? He's gonna hate you now. You're so stupid and selfish. Why do you always do this?  Stop. Stop now. I can't deal with this at the moment. I turned my music up to try and drown out the little voice and it worked. Within minutes I was fast asleep.