Ashton Irwin Imagines - COMPLETED

Anxiety

Things had been so great lately. Your boyfriend had just gotten home from tour a month ago and you two had been spending a lot of quality time together. Things always seemed to be better when he was with you, but things felt different tonight and you weren't sure why. Ashton was with you, holding you tightly which normally gave you comfort but the thoughts kept creeping in and you couldn't shut them out no matter how hard you tried. Ashton was asleep next to you with his arms around you, your head pressed against his chest as his heartbeat echoed through your ears. It was already 3am and you hadn't slept yet. Your hands were sweating and beginning to tremble, your heart was beginning to race and you knew instantly what was about to happen. You looked at Ashton once more only to find he was still sound asleep. You so desperately wanted to wake him up but you couldn't bring yourself to do so. He'd been spending so much time in the studio lately, the lack of sleep had to be catching up with him. You decided to go downstairs and deal with your anxiety down there where you couldn't wake him up. You took a deep breath and slowly removed Ashton's arm that was around you off, letting it rest on the soft mattress. You slowly climbed out of bed, closing the bedroom door behind you.

Once you got downstairs you felt your heart beating even faster, your mind racing for no reason. You were beginning to feel sick and Ashton's shirt that was on your body was beginning to stick to your skin. You walked into the kitchen and grabbed some water, drinking it slowly and hoping that the anxiety would go away but it was only getting worse. You felt like your lungs were closing and you wanted nothing more than to run upstairs into Ashton's arms but you felt bad from how hard he'd been working. Suddenly you couldn't think straight and you rested your arms on the counter, burying your face in them as you desperately tried to catch your breath. You heard footsteps coming down the stairs, part of you feeling relieved as you realized it was Ashton, but you still couldn't calm down. You heard Ashton whispering your name in the dark room before you felt one of his hands on your back. "Y/N, you okay?" You shook your head and felt the tears well up in your eyes, Ashton's arms went around your waist to comfort you as he pulled you up and turned you around in his arms, your head now on his chest as his hands rubbed your back. "I've got you babe, you're okay. Don't fight it y/n, just go with it. I'm here baby, you're safe." He slowly swayed your bodies back and forth as you slowly began to calm down. Once it was over you buried your face in his shoulder to breathe in his scent, his hands still rubbing your back. "You okay?" You nodded your head not trusting your voice quite yet, the both of you staying in that same position for a few minutes before you pulled away to get some more water. Ashton kept his eyes on you the whole time. He always worried about you and he knew you struggled with anxiety and anxiety attacks quite badly, so did he and he knew sometimes all you needed was the person you loved the most right next to you to remind you everything would be alright.

You sat down at the kitchen table, the glass of water in front of you, your hands resting on it as you were still shaky from the anxiety attack. He walked over to you and crouched down on the floor in front of you, his hands grabbing yours before letting go of one of them and bringing it to your face, stroking your cheek softly with his thumb. "Feeling alright baby?" You took a shaky breath and looked at him, your eyes meeting his as his hands went to rub your leg. "I feel sick." "It'll go away soon babe. Why'd you leave the bed? Why didn't you wake me if you were feeling this anxious?" You shrugged your shoulders and he sighed, pulling you down onto his lap. "You know why. Tell me. C'mon darling, you know you don't have to hide anything from me. I won't judge you. Tell me y/n." "You've been working really hard lately Ash. You and the boys... I didn't wanna wake you. You must be so tired." "Y/N you know no matter how exhausted I may be that I still care about you more than anything else in the world. You're my biggest priority, you know that. I love you y/n. You're my girl, I wanna take care of you, okay?" You nodded your head and buried your head in his shoulder, his hands on your bare thighs going up your back as he kissed your head. "Any particular reason why you're anxious babe?" You shook your head and closed your eyes, your lips brushing against his shoulder blade. He sighed and stood up, carrying you upstairs carefully and tucking you into bed before laying next to you. You instinctively rested your head on his chest, his arms going back around you to hold you securely. "Go to sleep baby. I'm gonna stay home tomorrow, alright? Just you and me tomorrow. We got all the time in the world." He kissed your head a few times and watched you as your eyes fluttered shut, one of your hands grabbing his that was around your waist to hold it in yours. He smiled and watched your breathing slow down, not going back to sleep that night so he could watch you sleep peacefully as held you in his arms.