What Was Ours

3H. A rush

"I'll go and visit you often. Maybe I can live with you guys again. I want to spend some time with my grandfather."

Just like that Kim TaeHyung was gone from his life again. He decided to stay with his grandfather and he'd come over in the next few days to pick up his belongings. The decision was the most natural and obvious one to be made.

As for his uncle and him, they fared well with negotiations. They probably got more than what they paid for but Jin was determined to pay every single cent back. He didn't want to owe anyone anything, he couldn't owe to anybody. He didn't want to feel trapped like he did with Mister Jeon. Uncle Donghae would help him with the farm and hopefully they can manage to make some earnings this year. He only had a few months before they would foreclose his childhood home, it had to be enough time for the crop to grow and be sold. Enough for him to try and raise more money to hopefully buy more time until everything was paid for.

"You're thinking again," Jiminie day next to me, facing me. "Should I bring back the kid? You seemed to think less, when he was here." He scrunched his face in displeasure.

"No, hyung," I shook my head. "He's with his family. I'm just thinking about ours. We need a miracle these days." I took his hand and traced it. How his hands changed in the time I have been gone. They're no longer soft and chubby, they're strong, sturdy, and have callous.

"I'm here and as long as I can help, I'll do it. This is where we had a lot of good times and the baby is going to grow up here too. Let's work hard," he encouraged.

"Let's work hard, hyung." I smiled.

He smiled and it felt light again. We'd be okay, I had good people in this home willing to put every ounce of energy they had and even more to save this place. We'd make it somehow.

"You're here. I thought no one was here." It's Hyungie! It's been weeks since he last came. I've heard he'd come twice without me being here; I had been busy working ten to twelve hour shifts. Today had been one of those tiring days which I wanted nothing more than to go to bed and put my feet up and pass out.

"You're here. Is everything okay?" I ask, all of a sudden, worried that something might happened. I think, eomma said he'd been here two days ago.

"It's great. I just had to come see my cute husband and see how our baby is doing." He touches my belly and it's such a kind and gentle gesture that I'm left speechless.

"You should really stop saying those things," I say, as I serve us some dinner.

"Say what?" He asks genuinely confused or maybe he'd just a good actor. Could I trust him to be genuine?

I believed in lies before and I didn't want to go back there.

"About us being married," I'm interrupted.

"I want to be with you. Would you like to marry me? I have no ring and nothing to my name. Heck, I know we haven't known each other for long and it might seem like a strange proposal but I'd like for us to marry. I think I'm in love with you." His confession has left me shaken to the core, I sit down.

"You don't have to answer me now, but know that I'm serious about this. I'm willing to take care of you and the baby and it may be a rushed proposal I like you and I think you like me. Most people here think it's my child anyways...would you think about it?"

Was he proposing because of the rumors? Or did he really love me?

"Hyungie, I don't think I can. You don't understand how this small town works, they'll talk about anything until there's something new. So, the rumor will die down, eventually. You don't have to marry me." I try to explain.

"I want to." He leans towards me, there's not enough space between us. My heart beats faster, and I'm out of breath.

He places his lips on top of mine, I don't do a thing, he kisses me for real. It's different from the kisses I received from Mister Jeon. Hyungie isn't holding himself back. I hold onto his arms to balance myself because I'm falling.

"I know we're young but I've never been so sure of anything more in my life. Can you give me an answer next time I come? I'll ask for you parents permission and my grandfather won't oppose—he likes you. So think about it."

I nod. We eat our supper quietly. I'm not sure if it was tense or calm, I was too busy in my thoughts. Time passed by in a haze. We were both standing outside before his car.

"I'll come back in a week. Think about it, okay?" He kisses me, it was gentle and sweet. "I'll miss you." And with that he left again.

"You make it hard to believe he's not your lover," my appa stated as he and the rest of my family made their way back home.

"Don't look so longingly, as he puts distance between you," uncle Donghae puts his arm around my shoulder. I look up at him and notice the changes in the day. The dusk was upon us, I hadn't noticed how late it was. The sky looked wonderful and I ran inside. I didn't want to hear anyone.

I'm wrong for thinking about him, I'm wrong for thinking he's the same as Mister Jeon. If they're not the same, then why am I afraid? I hug my pillow seeking some comfort. I don't want to break again. It hasn't been long and here in thinking about giving him an answer? Am I fickle? No, I'm not. He's just left me confused because he's giving me the gestures, and love that I wished Mister Jeon would've done.

I had a lot of thinking to do this week but not enough time to think about it. There was work to be done here and at work. There would be no real time to think about a proposal. I didn't even know him well. We barely knew each other but something felt right. Was it right enough to get married? I don't know.

I saw the car Hyungie brought last time, I hurried my step to enter my home. He was sitting down in the living room, he was dressed nicely and held a bouquet of flowers. Had it been a week already? I timidly tried to straighten out my shirt before stepping inside to face him. Hyungie looked so handsome and I was a mess.

"Hello," he smiled as he stood up. "Have you thought about it?" I nod. "And?"

What's my answer?

February 08, 2019
This chapter happened so naturally today that I decided to post it without second guessing myself.