Keşke

Time Spent

They stood, taking each other in for several seconds... she, a bit out of breath and he, relaxed back, leaning against the door.  She finally broke the spell, suddenly very aware of the potential shift hovering on the edge of their little bubble.  "Uuhhh, sorry," she started, kind of shaking her head to redirect the undertones from spilling over. "I didn't mean to yell at you."  Can's head said Oh? I rather liked the sound of my shouted name on your lips, love.  And his mouth almost uttered the words, "Oh, I-  uh, didn't even notice, sorry-"  He shifted off the door reaching back to grasp the handle again, turning slightly away from facing her.  "I was just trying to hurry, so I guess I wasn't fully listening, I'm terribly sorry...  what did you want to ask?"  Sanem slung her purse across her body, "It's ok- I just well... sorry, but you said we are going to Akif's...  I thought just you would go- I mean- what would I be able to help with- why do I need to be there?"

It was a valid question, but not one that had ever entered his mind.  It was just natural to him that she would come with.  A small smile tickled the corners of his lips as he came to this realization.  He'd never seen himself in the company of another for so long, but with her- it's like it was pre-destined or something...  Huh!  How 'bout that!  he thought.  "Do you not want to come?"  Sanem cursed in her head- Dammit!  Dodging a question with one of his own, putting it back to me. Uff!   "Oh, it's not that I don't want to I just- "  Can interjected, "Allah!  You must be exhausted after today- I'm so sorry-"  This time she cut in, "No! Well, yes, it has been a very full day, but I'm not too tired.  I just really didn't understand what my role would be in accompanying you."

He smiled again, understanding in that moment-  that was precisely what he wanted.  Her to accompany him.  It was all he seemed to desire lately.  Her with him.  She gave him a skeptical glance, not knowing exactly why he was smiling at her.  He recognized it and back pedaled a little, "Well it's true you do not have prior experience correct?"  When he said it out loud he realized how it may have sounded, and he scolded himself...  Get your head in the right place man!   But she, in her purity, did not pick up on the possible double meaning.  Sanem shrugged, "Right... I just don't see how I could be of any assistance."  Can's smile widened, "I had really only expected you to observe...  learn and gain some experience Sanem, nothing more."  Ok, maybe the 'nothing more' wasn't exactly, completely truthful beyond a work-related sentiment, he admitted this.

She supposed it made sense, "Oh, I see-" He cut in again, "But if you're not interested, or you're feeling tired, it's not a problem-  you don't have to come.  I can get you a tax-"  She broke in again, "No no!  I'd like to come watch how things are done.  I just- well, I know things are a bit rushed with the dual campaigns and everything so, I just didn't want to be in the way or slow you down or anything, that's all."  He laughed at that one.  "Nonsense!  Whatever you want to learn more about with any aspect of the agency is completely open...  it's what being an intern is all about.  Learning, honing... so you can discover what interests you-  Help you to decide which direction you'd like to go and we can help get you there."  "Tamam," she smiled back at him.  He opened the door again, ushering her through in front of him and into the truck. 

About halfway there she asked, "Oh! Um... do you know how long it will take?"  Can shrugged a little, trying to figure...  "Mmmm, maybe 20 or 30 minutes, maybe 45- it depends on what all Akif has set up for us...   why?  You have a hot date or something?" he grinned and had said it lightheartedly, hoping to keep it casual so she'd respond, but inside he didn't know what he'd do if she said yes.  She blushed and gave kind of a forced laugh. Sanem! Why are you so awkward?! Ah!  "No, nothing like that-  I was just going to call my mom to let her know how late I'd be, but if it's going to be under an hour, it shouldn't be a big deal."  Can tilted his head back slightly, Ah yes... she comes from a traditional background.  He had long ago forgotten what it was like to have parents asking about his whereabouts or plans.  He'd become accustomed to it...  Partly a good thing he thinks but, there is facet to it that a part of him perhaps, still longs for.