Dance Of Night (A Diabolik Lovers Fanfiction)

Chapter 35 "Really."

Two years after that night, the Yucca flower withered and that man suddenly released Shu. All that time, we had not seen, heard or even sensed Shu to be alive except one time soon after she went away, and so it got to the point that I thought he had been killed. All this while my emotions were a mess, I aged no longer and I was angrier every day. Angry at that man who was supposed to be our father, at Shu for not having made sure she would be safe, at me for not doing so either, at Reiji for having caused Edgar's death.

I blamed myself daily, thinking I could have done something. Maybe if I had gone with Shu and Ayame to see her off that night I could have done something against Reiji.

I tried to go after Reiji to punish him for all he did, but after Shu was imprisoned he was impossible to reach, with Beatrix hovering over him all the time, as he was now next in line, being that we did not even know if Shu still lived. Reiji seemed so happy with this, compliant with his duties, pleasing his mother. I would have faced him in front of her, but I did not do it, seeing how it might upset her terribly, thinking about my own Mother. I did not know if I would be able to control myself and not kill him, honestly. This thought scared me.

I therefore developed a habit to exert my strength upon the closest object I could find whenever I saw him, unable to contain my anger. It was usually walls, which were left with wide holes. Both Beatrix and Reiji pretended to be ignorant whenever I had a fit of anger, as did the rest of the house, since in no time at all I could not contain my anger at anything.

The worst time I can recall is after I read that letter.

When Shu was released he suddenly appeared wide eyed in the gardens, where I usually spent most of my time. I was so surprised by his sudden apparition, I almost did not recognize him. He looked dirty and famished, I did not know how he even moved. I was by his side in no second and tried to speak to him but all he did was frantically ask me if I had any idea where Ayame was. After telling him I did not, he was set upon returning to the mansion to ask that man, which was nearly suicidal in his state. I urged him not to, but he would not listen. I had never seen him that way, he looked insane.

I followed him into the house to accompany him in this delusional idea of his, but was grabbed by the arm as he entered that man's private study without even knocking. Turning to see who it was I found Kanato grasping me with one hand and holding that bear of his with the other, his head cocked to the side, looking at the now closed door.

"Ne," he said, "that dead doll looks like Shu, Subaru."

"That is Shu, Kanato," I spat angrily at him for having stopped me, freeing myself from his grasp and pulling at the door handle which was now unmovable. "Tsk-" I muttered while hitting a nearby wall. All this time without seeing him and now I had lost him again.

"That is not Shu," Kanato said matter of factly, and as I turned around to see him, his eyebrows were creased together. "That doll is dead."

"What on earth are you talking about?!?" I asked him, but he was already gone.

I waited for hours in front of the door, not hearing a single movement within the room, and realized the people inside had probably teleported away. I went to look for Shu in his room, but he was not there.

By then all of us were aware that Shu had been released, but he was nowhere to be found and the only ones interested in finding him were me and Beatrix, much to Reiji's distaste.

It was a full month until I saw him again. I was in laying on my closed metal coffin in my room, turning the small blade my Mother had given me so long ago in my hands while looking at the Yucca flower that rested on a vase atop the fireplace to my left, withered as it was, seeming entirely dead, all brown and shriveled up, most of it's petals fallen, but the last one never coming off. I still changed the water every day, very careful as to not break the frail stem as I waited for it to die on its own. It withering away, it could only mean one thing, but I would not accept it, not until the last petal fell.