La Vida Loca

Ch.11 Apology

GIA'S POV.

I've been so confused ever since Anthony tried kissing me.

I really like him but, I don't know if being with him is right you know?

Besides, I haven't even talked to him or seen him since then.

I might see him today though, me and Manny got a call from one of the older homies to go to the warehouse for a meeting.

It's already 8 o'clock and freezing outside so I really don't wanna go but I have to.

"You ready?" Manny asks as I come out of my room. "Yeah" I say with a sigh.

We go outside and get into Manny's truck.

"Do you know what this meeting is about?" I ask him. "Yeah but I guess they wanna tell you and talk to you about it" he says.

I roll my eyes and nod.

When we get to the warehouse and go inside everyone's already there. Even Danny and Carlos. Anthony too.

We very awkwardly smile at each other.

"You can sit" Casper says. I look at Manny then take a seat and cross my legs with my hands on my lap.

"So, we um got some news today" he says in a strange way.

I scrunch my eyebrows.

"About what?" Manny asks before I could.

"Um, Speedy's dead" he says.

Any emotion or expression I had on my face just instantly went away.

Speedy is my "father"s nick name.

"He was assassinated in Mexico this morning, we don't know by who yet" he says.

I don't feel sad. I don't know him. I don't care.

"When is-" Manny starts to say but I cut him off by storming out of there.

"Gia!" I hear Manny say coming after me.

"Open the fucking door" I say to him as I try to open the car door.

"What's wrong??" He asks.

"You KNEW this shit was about my dad so why the fuck did you bring me hear?!" I say angry.

He opens his mouth to say something but I speak first.

"You know what whatever I don't care open the fucking door or I'll walk my ass home!" I yell at him.

He sighs and opens the car and we drive home.

It was a quiet ride.

The tension was so thick though. Could slice that shit.

As soon as Manny parks in the front curb by the sidewalk I get off the car.

"Gia! Why are you mad??" He asks before I could even walk on the grass.

"Cause you think I fucking care about that bitch!? I don't! EVERYONE knows he ain't in my fucking life and to have all those foo's watch me when Casper tells me he's dead like I'm suppose to give a fuck!" I yell at him.

"He left like everyone else in my fucking life! He's a piece of shit that never gave two fucks about me! Now I'm supposed to give a fuck about him just cause he's dead??" I say.

Everything I've been holding in for the past 4 years is coming out.

"He's still the leader of our gang your his blood-" he starts but I cut him off.

"I DONT CARE! I will never consider that bitch my father, my blood, nothing! He ain't shit to me!" I yell.

"He left, you left, mom left, that's all anybody ever fucking does is leave me!" I say as I start to feel my eyes water.

"Gia" he says apologetically.

"No one was there for me! Because of all the bullshit with the FBI and our gang not even Danny and Carlos or anyone in our family could help me!

You know what happened while you were gone?? I was in foster care for a YEAR while our mom was getting high off crack!

I had to deal with that shit all by myself! I TRIED to call you! You were my last fucking hope! But nope, nothing from you, you were with the father YOU actually have and your other family,

Manny I was 14-15 with no one dealing with all this bullshit alone! I had no one! Then, ha, then I get fucking pregnant!" I yell now crying and THAT one word got his attention.

He looks at me in shock.

"I lost my daughter, I was already 4 months and her heart fails, Jaylah, she was the only person- the only person I KNEW I was gonna have, the only person that would love me back and care about me, I couldn't even fucking have her!!!" I yell now balling tears.

Manny just grabs me and wraps his arms around me.

"No one cares you never cared!!" I yell and cry into his chest.

"Gia I'm so fucking sorry, I'm fucking sorry" he says sincerely as he just hugs me and I keep my hands over my face.

"I'm sorry for fucking leaving I told you I know I've been the worst fucking brother to you ever since we were kids and I'm sorry" he tells me hugging me tighter.

"Look" he starts as he releases me and I wipe my face.

"I know I've been gone and we haven't, had much of a brother sister relationship but we can now, especially if we're gonna be living together we gotta be cool, we're gonna be cool, aight?" He says sternly.

I nod.

"Stop crying" he says as he hugs me again this time I hug back.

"You're such a jerk" I say playfully as I take a deep breath.

He smiles.

"I know I know I'm sorry I'll make it up to you come on you want me to buy you some ice cream?" He says sarcastically.

"No bitch buy me a fucking cheese burger and cheese fries" I say pushing his chest.

He laughs.

"Alright let's go" he says as we get in his car.

I think NOW, after all these years, we actually are good.