Spider-Man one shots

4th wall down

AU where Tony doesn't know about Spider-mans identity. Okay I have no idea what I did seriously I have no actual freaking idea. But there will be a story with the plot around this I think, just without the 4th wall breaking... it's scary....sorry.. continue onwards... you have been warned....

"STOP! Hey you. Yeah person hiding behind the screen most likely laying in bed? Couch? Dinner table? Oh don't tell me you are standing. Come on who likes being active?! Wait.. no you wouldn't... you better not be reading this on the toilet! Never mind that, anyways it's probably mid-night/dark out and you are reading this. You need your beauty rest you know. Well anyways hello I'm Peter Parker and my best friend Deadpool taught me how to break this so called 'fourth wall'. It's weird guess I'm just some figment of imagination. Oh well. Anyways you must be wondering what I'm doing. For 1. You can't even see me, so I guess I should put an image on what's happening right now. I'm currently kicking iron-man suits. They have been hacked and Mr. Stark.. yes Iron Man. Portrayed by a very famous guy in your universe. Yes Robert Downey Jr himself. (oH mY gOd iTs rObErT dOwNeY jR!) Great guy... I think? Dunno. Never met him... unless he is Tony Stark... or... oh my god.... is... no.... is Tony Stark him?! Sorry my mind is currently being blow. Literally a repulor just shot my head and I don't think I should be bleeding."

"Sorry for that cut I had to break apart more iron-man suits. Anyways though I literally don't know what I'm saying right now. My mouth is being controlled by this crazy girl who is charging her phone while typing away with a deep dish pizza by her side and laying on her comfy bed. Procrastinating her science fair project *pukes* which is due on Friday. So that's fun? But you might want to know why I'm fighting his suits. They have been hacked... wait I already said this? Dammit. It's cool to help Mr. Stark though when fighting. He doesn't know me in this universe I guess. But he does know I'm a kid because I'm 3 seconds the author is going to type something about "Oh No Tony's Suit Gets Hacked And Does A Scan On Me Revealing My Height, Weight *scaryyyy*, And It Will Say That Im Around 15 Or 16" nice one author nice..."

Tony's suit started to go crazy. Peter or Spider-Man looked up and gasped as he raised his hand aiming at Peters heart.

"I can't control it!" Iron-Man yelled.

Peter crouched down expecting impact but instead the hacker stopped the suit. Maybe... This Spider-man can reveal some things about the secret identity. The hacker typed fast as the voice of JARVIS spoke up. "Scanning. Scan complete."

It revealed that this hero seemed to be a teenager. 100 pounds. 5'7. Tony gasped as he realized a kid was helping him out.

"You are a kid?!"

"STOP! See I told you. And I'll probably say something cheesy around the lines of "Yes don't be so shocked I'm still a hero. Or something like that *sigh* PETER JUST LET ME TYPE THE DAMN STORY OKAY! Jeez sorry Author. Please by all means continue *sips bleach*"

"No.. I mean yes... maybe. I'm a teenager! Almost adult! I can still fight though. I'm nothing less." Peter argued.

"Uh huh. Well Kid. The hack was all I needed to figure out the location-"

"WOAH WOAH WOAH! HOLD THE PHONE AUTHOR! How in what world does that make sense? Oh let me just hack in, oh no Tony has realized my location. Can this story get any sadder? CUT ME SLACK! I'm trying to end this story and not spoil a lot in case I decide to actually make this a story... without you breaking the damn 4th wall. Now hold on we don't tolerate that use of words. And it's your fault I'm breaking the wall... I mean if I'm supposedly fake 'obviously my amazing self isn't' then you can easily delete it all."

BACK TO STORY

The battle ended and Peters mask was a bit ripped to reveal one of his eyes. The color and everything. Tony looked at him and smiled.

"Thanks for the help."

"No problem Iron-Man. Woah look!" He pointed to nothing as he jumped away.

Peter quickly changed out and walked back inside the Stark expo which they were at. Everyone seemed shaken up and others started to go near Tony, almost like how a scared child hides behind there mother.

"I'm going to go and fix everything." Tony announced that's when he turned and saw Peter. His eye color...

"Hmm JARVIS scan." Tony whispered to his AI. It scanned and showed the exact measurements, and weight off Spider-man.

"H-Hi Sir! I was wondering if you can sign my Stark Expo magazines?" Peter smiled almost in a lost of words.

"Sure thing kid." Tony replied as he quickly signed and started to walk off. Before he walked away he whispered in Peters ear, "Thanks for the help Spider-man."

"STOP! Woah that was decent... not too bad I guess... can improve big time though. I mean I guess it will turn into a good decent story but who knows. I'm going to go though. In my universe my daughter, Amelia, is calling me. Yes I have a daughter she is 3 and her mother is non other than MJ herself. Amelia probably wants me to read her a bed time story, I'm sure she will enjoy listening to some of Grandpa Tony's stories or maybe Pop pop Steve's war stories.......

HA just kidding you should have seen your surprised expression I'm only 15. But I'll leave now byee my little ... uhhh... er... um wat did you want me to call them Author? You had one job Pete just the one! Cookies smh. Good bye my little cookies!"

IM SO SORRY I DONT KNOW WHAT I FREAKING MADE! ILL GO NOW.
-Showers In bleach-