Standing By

253 Missed Calls

(Tim)

Converging on the food court, we all started in four different directions—Avi and Austin to The Soda Fountain, Chance and Adam to Auntie Anne's, Rob towards The Ice Creamery (bumping into tables and chairs along the way), and me to The Great American Cookie, my eyes fixated on a giant chocolate chip cookie dipped in chocolate, my mouth already watering.

"Stop!" Greene yelled at us, as a group of women started ogling Avi with dewey starry eyes and Rob tumbled face-first into a trash can, letting loose a string of colorful language. "Do any of you know the definition of together?"

"Eeek!" I squeaked as I got blocked form the cookie stand by several women, one of whom had shoved a pad of paper in my face. "Hey! I want a cookie. Get out the way please!"

"I'll buy it for you, Tim," one of them volunteered as I tried to sidestep her in my determination to cookie-dom.

"Thanks, but I can get it," I said, lifting a hand and batting the paper out of my face. "Excuse me."

"Pleeeaaase, Tim, I want an autograph!"

"I want a picture!"

"I want you!"

"I want a cookie," I complained, still keeping an eye on the one I wanted. I'd be willing to share of it if I could just get to it!

"Aaah!" Austin squealed from The Soda Fountain. "Blinding me, dude—you don't need flash in a freaking mall!"

Rob sat up, the detachable top half of the trash can now sliding down his back. "Could I get some help over here?"

"Ohhh, look at Rob," the woman to my right groaned sympathetically. "Poor Rob."

"Rob!" Chance called, abandoning pursuit of a pretzel as poor Adam got pushed into a pole, papers flying in his face. A flash went off in Chance's face and he stumbled, knocking over a chair. "Oof."

"Ohpf!" Avi yelped, having been rescued from his autograph hounds by Diaz. Avi started to fall but was quickly pulled to his feet.

"Are you OK, Avi?" he asked hurriedly, and he nodded at him. "This is not a meet and greet! I need everyone to back off please!"

"Help!" Rob cried again, shaking his head like a wet dog and making trash fly everywhere.

"I got ya." The woman next to me hurried to give him a hand.

"Get away from him!" Greene snapped, pulling a camera away from Austin's face.

"Let her help me!" Rob begged, the trash can lid being eased off of him by the nice lady.

I jumped a mile when I felt a hand start to slide into my waistband. "Whoa there!" Hand on my back, I could deal with; hand on my arm was fine, but I drew the line at hands creeping into my pants. "Whoa, whoa, whoa!" I whipped around and managed to dance out of the giggling girl's grasp.

Diaz batted her away, snapping angrily at her. He grabbed my arm and pulled me towards him.

"I was willing to talk to you or whatever until you did that!" I called over my shoulder at her.

"What she do? Dooo-dooo-dooo?" Avi hooted, evidently still a touch high.

"Stuck her hands in my damn pants!" I exclaimed. "Can you believe it?"

"Rob! Whadaya doing?" Greene snapped, scooping him off the floor where he was signing something for the lady who'd helped him.

"Hey, she helped me! So I'm willing to give a little," Rob explained, suddenly getting five more people clamoring over him for autographs.