Standing By

My Issues Are Bigger Than Yours

(Adam)

"Adaaammm!" Chance screamed as Tim walked out the door.  "Adaaammm!"   

    Austin grabbed at my arm.  "Stop him!"

    "You can't let him walk away!" Rob shrieked, face red from crying.

    "I have to," I whispered, eyes spilling over, feelings swirling inside as I watched him turn and leave us.  Oh my God.  This couldn't be happening.  I had thought things were bad when Chris left the band, but this hurt worse.  Way worse.  Chris had left to pursue other avenues.  He was following his heart, his hopes, and his dreams.  Tim was not.  Tim was leaving to make his wife happy.  Tim was not happy.  It was killing him to say those words.  'I'm quitting'.  Ohhh my heart.  I bent over at the waist, way over, my hair practically brushing the floor.  Make it stop hurting, make the pain go away.  When Chris left, he was happy.  Sad but happy at the same time.  And I was sad but happy for him.  My heart was breaking for Tim.

    A hand fell on my shoulder.  "Hey.  What's going on?  Talk to me.  Please."

    Hearing a deep voice, I looked up quickly, hoping beyond hope that it was Tim.  No.  Avi.  It was Avi.  "Adam.  What is going on?"

    "He... quit," I answered, my own voice sounding hollow.  "Tim... quit."

    "The band," Rob got out, pulling his glasses off and dabbing at his eyes.  It was a losing battle.

    Austin reached out and shook me.  "Go get him!  Go stop him!  Don't let him leave us!"

    Kevin picked up Chance's hand.  "Why are you bleeding?"

    "Huh?  What?" he asked absently, eyes glazed over with unshed tears.

    I glanced down at Chance's hand and wrist, the palm now oozing with blood.  "Oh my God, Chance, what'd you do to yourself?"

    Austin grabbed Chance and shook our shell-shocked baritone.  "Chance!  Get with the program!"

    Avi grabbed a handful of napkins and handed several to Rob, dripping tears, and a bunch to Chance, dripping blood.

    Chance finally seemed to snap out of it and looked at the wad of napkins Avi was shaking at him.  "What?"

    "Your hand!" Austin, Ai, Kevin, and I yelled at him, Rob now pulling his head up to look at Chance.  He let out a shriek.  Chance looked down at his hand and let out a strangled cry of his own, clearly surprised at his own injury.  Slowly, he opened his left fist, gasping at a large pice of broken glass.

    "What the?!?!" Kevin breathed, looking down at in.  "Where'd that come from?"

    "Floor," I answered, bending over to pick up the other remnants of Tim's glass mug.  I scooped them up in my hands carefully.  "Chance must have picked up a piece and not discarded it."

    "I don't even recall picking it up," Chance admitted, pressing the napkins tightly to his palm.  "Ow.  Damn.  I must have had a death grip on that thing."

    "Oh, there you are!" Kirstie's voice rang out as she bounced into the bar.  She did a double take at Kevin.  "Never thought I'd find you in a bar!  Um."  She paused, looking from me to Chance, from Austin to Rob, to Avi.  Her eyes skirted back to Chance's hand.  "What's going on?  Where's Tim?"

    At the mention of Tim's name, Chance finally lost it, throwing the napkins on the floor.  "Fuck it, let it bleed, I don't care."

    Avi and Kevin ran over to her, whispering the news that none of the four of us could bear to repeat.  Her eyes got huge as Avi filled her all in.  I bent over again, concentrating on my breathing before I lost any semblance of sense I had about me yet.