New Beginnings (undergoing editing)

Chapter(6) Liar Liar

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Hey guys! Decided to publish this a little early. I was gonna wait until Monday but then I looked and this story is #1 in overprotective wow! THANKS! Y'all r the best! Don't forget that! Enjoy!

Luv you all!! Enjoy and remember that your beautiful in every way🙃

Recap:
They look fine and Liza seems to be gaining a tiny bit of weight. Which is good because she needs to, she's so damn small. I decide that's she clean, and we go downstairs to meet the boys. Then we start our day.

Back to story

It's been three hours since we went shopping. Which went over badly, I ended up being bridal carried out of the store and put into the car. I had a huge panic attack which was followed quickly by flashbacks.

I haven't moved in three hours. I'm too shaken up and everything is aching from the squirming caused by the flashbacks. The memories just stopped a couple minutes ago, and my head is tired. Now the boys want to talk with me about all the lovely shit that just went on it my brain.

"I don't wanna talk." I tell them. I turn over so my back is towards them and I dig my face into the leather couch. I exhale deeply and try not to cry or have another panic attack. During one of my flashbacks apparently, I said something about my rape. So they wanna talk about that.

I chose not to tell Toby about the rape. Whoops. (Not) I did that on purpose, the not telling them. It was six months ago. If I was pregnant that I would've been showing by now. But I'm not, and I've had my periods somewhat on time. Not really but whatever. They were still there so it counts.

Also because it was six months ago, if I was going to die then I would've already died. So it doesn't matter, at all. Therefore I'd like to forget that it ever happened. I hear everyone leave and I think that they're gone so I turn over on the couch so I'm facing the ceiling and sit up.

I look around and Toby is sitting on the love seat beside me. I stare at him and he says "hey kiddo I know that you don't want to talk about it but... were you? You know, raped?"  He says awkwardly looking right at me with sadness, grief, and pity in his eyes. It's almost like he already knows the answer, but he doesn't want himself to be right.

"Yeah..." I whisper underneath of my breath. I look at the floor, it suddenly became very interesting. He takes my chin and picks it up. "It's not your fault. Understand?" He says I nod, and he looks sad still but a little less emotional.

"Now awkward question, have you had a period since then?" He asks me I nod. He sighs and looks at me.

"Never lie to me again. Please. I love you and want to help you, we all do. But if you keep lying then we can't. Now tonight your going to bed at ten, and your sleeping with me. That way there I'm right there if you need anything. We love you, kiddo. Believe it or not, Mark and Lewis had to call James to come talk to me because I had a panic attack and the boys were worried about me. We all have our demons, and they probably won't go away. But sometimes admitting that you have them is the best thing that you can do. So don't lie to me please. We all know what it's like living with depression."

He paused taking a deep breath before continuing as if he was calming himself down before talking some more.

"A little while ago, right after Mark and Lewis adopted me, I started to become depressed. I self-harmed but now I'm clean. It's the same ending to the story with most of us, the beginnings are different to our stories, but they all end happily. And so will yours, but for us to help you, you need to trust us. Stop lying please when we ask you how you are. We mean it genuinely."