Off Ones Rockers II • Lashton

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Seventeen

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Luke awkwardly walked into his room, his eyes flickering upon Ashton before adverting straight to the floor, the silence was already eating him alive. The older boy was reading a book, but he instantly put it down when he saw the blonde, not caring to mark or observe where he was.

"Luke," he said softly, not wanting to scare the blonde already, he could see the tension on his body. "Can we talk, please?" Ashton patted the spot in front of him, where he already sat cross-legged.

The fifteen-year-old looked at Ashton anxiously but proceeded to sit opposite him on his bed, his own legs crossed symmetrically to the older boy, nervously chewing on his lip, drawing blood to the surface.

"Luke I'm sorry," Ashton admitted, quite forcefully causing the blonde to jump and frown. Luke didn't understand why he was apologising. He was the one who had initiated the kiss and thus he felt he was the one who had to apologise. Luke could only conclude that Ashton was apologising because he didn't feel the same way back.

This sent tears to the surface of the blonde's eyes as he quickly tried to get off of the bed, too embarrassed to face his roommate. Ashton quickly, but gently grabbed the blonde's wrists indicating from him to stay put, Luke was too weak and emotional to argue otherwise.

"I took advantage of you Luke," Ashton elaborated. "You were vulnerable that night, and I don't know what was going on in your little head when you kissed me, you probably didn't mean to but I should not have kissed you back knowing the state you were in."

Luke let the tears fall down his cheeks, he didn't know whether he was embarrassed that Ashton had seen him like that or if he was almost heartbroken, thinking the boy he really liked didn't feel the same way. "I meant to kiss you," Luke whispered in confirmation, he'd do it again if he could.

Ashton pouted, lifting the blondes head that was focused on his lap, and wiping the stray tears falling from his eyes. "Why are you crying?" Ashton asked confused, he understood that the situation was undoubtedly awkward, but couldn't comprehend why the blonde was upset.

Luke sniffled and looked at the older boy who looked genuinely concerned, he smiled sadly taking in his beautiful hazel eyes that radiant the purest soul, and his lightly sculpted face, littered with little acne scars that could only be seen up close, but Luke didn't care they emphasised Ashton's uniqueness.

Luke brought his hand up so he was holding Ashton's wrist that was still gently cupped around his chin. "Alex said I could move rooms if we didn't solve this and I don't think we ever will," Luke simply shrugged, longing to be Ashton's embrace.

"Move rooms?" Ashton asked confused, a sense of panic surging through him. "I thought we just solved the problem, I don't understand?"

Luke lightly pushed Ashton's hand off of his face and stood up, moving over to his side of the room and looked at the door, wanting to be the other side of it. "I like you, Ashton."

Ashton frowned, he didn't know that the blonde felt this way but he also didn't know why Luke didn't know he liked him too. He thought that his feelings were transparent to the younger boy.

The curly-haired boy chuckled. "I think we can solve that problem, Luke," with a small smirk, quietly getting off of his bed and heading over to the blonde who was still inaudibly sobbing. Ashton tenderly placed his hands on the blonde's hips causing him to jump once again, mostly from insecurity and turned around to look at Ashton intimidated. He slowly leaned in and placed a small kiss to the blonde's lips in hopes of providing him with a clear answer.

Luke sniffled and wiped his eyes with the hem of jumper sleeves. "You don't have to kiss me out of pity," he mumbled, his body giddy with unexplainable feelings.

Ashton shook his head, unaware of how naive the fifteen-year-old actually was. "You're so silly Luke," he laughed. "I like you too, you know, I mean I thought I made that clear."

Luke frowned, stepping back puzzled. "You do?"

"Of course I do. I mean who wouldn't, you get two for the price of one. You're sweet and good looking. I never wanted to say anything because I assumed you are straight."

Luke shrugged. "I thought I was straight until I met you, to be honest. I've never liked someone before." Ashton internally smiled at the blondes innocence, and that he was his first crush.

"I don't believe that I bet all the girls were after you at school," Ashton said, in flirty but bantery manner, stepping closer to the blonde and holding both his hands in his owns admiringly.

"No one ever liked me," Luke admitted, beginning to question why Ashton even liked him, his insecurity kicking in stronger than it was before. "I was fat," he said recalling his past year in school. "Still am," he muttered under his breath, letting go of Ashton's hands once again and sitting down on his bed.

Ashton couldn't believe what he was hearing and still couldn't get used to what the young boy said about himself, how oblivious he was. "I think you're handsome Luke," he admitted, climbing on his bed and sitting opposite him. Luke looked at him sceptically, not trusting what the curly haired boy was saying.

The seventeen-year-old remembered that Alex had told him once that honesty went a long way with people like Luke, realism was what they needed as they were living in some distorted fantasy. "I do really like you Luke, and I'd love to be in a relationship or something like that if that would even work in here. But, I don't think I could truly be your boyfriend until you begin to eat more."

He felt Luke's body tense and his breath hitch. "Why?" he whispered, highly confused.

"I'd feel responsible for letting you do this to yourself, I'd feel like I'd break you every time I hug you and I don't want to be feeling your bones every two seconds. But, mainly I don't want to be your lifeline, the reason why you are eating, some type of guilt trip. Your recovery needs to be for you, and you only."

Luke sighed, he didn't understand fully what Ashton was saying but he knew they were both fragile and it would disrupt their recovery. "But, " Ashton continued. "Maybe we can be friends with benefits for now or something, like kiss and hug every now and then, but now rely upon each other and if that works then maybe we could become boyfriends, and I'd like that."

Luke nodded, knowing it was going to be the best he'd get, probably the closest thing he'd ever get to a boyfriend. "Yeah, I'd like that too." Swiftly he leaned in and placed a small kiss on the older boys lips, which only caused Ashton to grab him turn what was a small innocent gesture into a deep, intimate kiss.

Ashton knew it was risky, his emotions were too strong and that eventually they would overcome the rational side of him and leave both broken.

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This is way longer than I thought it was going to be and it's pretty shit because I suck at romance but at least it's something

Please comment on what you think.

Thank you so much for reading.