Like I'm Gonna Lose You

(17) Leaving You

-1 year later-

Two weeks after Brady's first birthday was the week that Bucky had to leave. Lindsey woke up that morning and cried in the shower. Bucky laid there as he listened to her cry as he started to break into his own tears. He finally got up and wiped his own tears and joined her in the shower he put her against the shower wall and they had sex one last time for the next two months. "I love you I have loved you since we were 12 years old baby I'm not going anywhere I married you three years ago today baby because I already knew that you were my girl the only girl I could ever want or need and I still feel that way baby." he said as he started to finish in her. 

"I love you James." she said

They finished up in the shower and he got his stuff on and his bag together. Lindsey got the kids dressed and fed then they all piled into Lindsey's car. She started the long drive to Fort Benning he reached over and grabbed her hand and kissed her knuckles. They pulled in beside Winnie and James who had Gary with them. 

They got both kids out of the car and started to walk away. James looked down when Bucky completely ignored them. "I told you Winnie." James said 

They followed behind them Bucky gave Brady to Lindsey. He kissed both kids then he kissed Lindsey goodbye "Don't forget how much I love you baby and that I will miss you three more than anything in this world. You are my world baby you all three are and I'll see you soon okay." he said with tears in his eyes.

"I love you James we will miss you too." she said as she gave him one last kiss. 

He seen his parents behind her but didn't acknowledge them. Winnie finally said "James Buchanan." as he started to walk away he stopped and turned "Don't.. you three don't deserve a goodbye from me I have to leave my wife and my kids for this we left for a reason we haven't spoken in a year so I don't even know why you all are here." he said then he blew Lindsey a kiss then walked away. 

"Okay Haven hold mama's hand okay. Let's go home mama has things to do." She said as she wiped tears then took  Haven's hand and carried Brady on her hip and walked right by her dad without a word. 

She got both kids in their car seats then headed back to Macon. She got signed up for online classes at UGA when she got home and ordered her books for her classes. She had two classes that were on campus so she had to enroll the kids at the same daycare that Mia enrolled their kids in and they decided that they would just carpool since they had the same campus days. 

Bucky struggled in the beginning especially at night and he did his best to not draw attention to himself when he had night mares. Brody was stationed at Fort Benning when they saw his last name one night they got his older brother when he had one that woke up everyone. Brody came in he hugged his little brother. "You gotta be tough little brother okay..I've talked to Mia they are fine in a few weeks you will be see them you just gotta pull through okay you can do this. I know you are tough when you need to be. You are mix of mom and dad. But this isn't the time to be terrified okay." he said

"Okay." Bucky said 

"Go wash your face and try and relax your mind little brother okay." he said as he slapped his back

"Yeah." Bucky said then he went into the bathroom then went back to sleep.