Gone 2 Long

16

Zion

"I told you before Elom, she's my girl."

"Yeah, but you motherfuckers been broken up for 3 years so stop living the past lil bitch."

"I think it's time you go back home and fuck off outta here." Passive aggression was clearly evident in my tone. After that night I explained to everyone what the situation was, it seemed like everyone just flipped a switch towards me.

We did a photo shoot the following day and I promise I've never felt so hated and unwanted in my life. Everyone is acting like I just did this to her but I was in high school, I didn't know what I wanted but I'm grown now and I accept responsibility for my actions.

The front door was opened and a flash flood of the boys and various grocery bags came streaming through the door. Elom and I placed our game consoles aside and went to check out what was going on. Upon entering the kitchen, all the boys faces lit up when they were faced with the image of mini-me.

"Ayy Elom, you're finally here you lil fuck." Austin exclaimed as he ruffled Elom's fade, the rest of the boys celebrated and greeted him in a similar manner before facing me and mumbling a few hello's. I've had just about enough of getting the cold shoulder for something that happened before they even knew of my goddamn existence.

"Guys, listen..." I spoke up grabbing their attention. "I know what I did was literally the worst thing any human being can do, trust me. I got the lectures from m parents, her parents, you fucking name it but I'm just tired of you gents treating me like this just happened. I'm so fucking in love with this chick that I haven't been with anyone else for the past 3 years and you guys know that. I honestly really do apologize for treating her like an unworthy piece of shit. I was very pathetic and insensitive but I promise you I've changed and I'll never do anyone as dirty as I did her."

As I was speaking, I heard the door opening but I paid no attention to it, thinking it's one of the gents. I caught a glimpse of small smiles on the boy's faces and I thought it had been because they were loving the apologetic words that were streaming out my mouth but I was proven to be wrong.

"You shouldn't be telling us all this shit, Antheia is the one that needs to hear it." Austin replied with a slight smirk plastered upon his face, not only confusing me but causing me to be a little heartsore in all honesty.

"Don't you think I've tried. She ignores me each time I try speaking to her and she has me blocked on every social media site possible. I don't know what the fuck to do."

"You could just come apologize to me right now." I knew that heavenly sounding voice all too well, it has to be. I turned to see Antheia holding a bags from Panda Express and a bunch of balloons. Her honey glazed eyes were covered with a glossy sheer cover accompanied by a small smile on her beautiful lips.

"Well can I speak to you alone at least, like in private?" Her head bobbed up and down in an agreeing notion while she placed the items down, walking out the kitchen towards the patio. I watched as all the boys except Brandon, who looked slightly pissed if I may add, gave me the thumbs up and wished me luck while my idiotic, retarded brother made a thrusting motion while mouthing her name. I rolled my eyes at the hideous sight before seating myself next to Antheia at the long table.

I looked up to face her and her beautiful eyes contained mixed emotions of anger, distrust and betrayal. I immediately felt a pang in my chest knowing I'm completely at fault for the entire situation.

"Was I not enough for you Caleb? What did I do that made you decide you'd break our promise to one another?" The tears that had been welling up in her eyes had over flooded and streamed down her face, at a slow yet painful rate.

"Antheia... you know how it was, I was captain of the team and the boys would always make fun of me and say shit just because I was still a virgin. I knew I should've stayed home that night especially considering you and I had just had a fight about us keeping shit from one another... something was bound to go wrong."

"So you cared more about the useless opinions and comments than the feelings of your girlfriend for 4 years who had also been your best friend for 15 years at that point? All those years and memories meant nothing to you?"

"Bab-" I stopped myself then and there realizing I no longer obtain such privilege. "Antheia, I was stupid and self-centred. I honestly had in my mind about how this would benefit me and not how it could ruin us. I've never forgiven myself because my dumbass not only did it once but twice and once I lost you for good, I didn't know what was to happen to me."

"I felt empty and lost, I was the worlds biggest douchbag. My mother wanted nothing to do to me all summer long and when I tried coming over to speak to you, Jason would always threaten to beat me up and I really didn't want to risk it."

"This has been my escape, the boys, the music... they all helped me numb the pain of not having you around but that pain will never be forgotten. I still hear your last words echoing in my mind and it's a constant reminder that I should've done better. You didn't deserve any of the bullshit I put you through. I'll never forgive myself, as long as you haven't had time to heal, I'll always have a constant reminder of what a horrible person I am."

"I'm not asking you to forget, all I want is for you to let me into your life again...even as a friend." I asked whispering the last part because I didn't want to be her friend. I wanted to hold her, to feel her soft skin against mine... I wanted to be hers.

I waited for a reaction out of her but she sat there, playing with her fingers and chewing on her bottom lip... she was thinking. I lifted my index finger, placing it on her chin, lifting her head in the process.

"What's it going to be my caramel snowflake." I asked using one of her old nicknames causing her to let out a little giggle with a tear or two rushing down her face. I made it my duty to wipe the tears, with a light brush of my thumb over her soft, crimson cheek.

"I just hate how you can still use that nickname and all is forgiven." A small smiled tugged at the end of my lips as I listened to the river of words flowing out her mouth.

"I forgave you... a long time ago actually. I've just been waiting for this moment, to hear you apologize. We can be friends... anything more than that is a longshot because I still need time to trust you again."

"As long as you're back in my life, that's all I'm grateful for."