Eternal Loneliness 💯

Chapter 8 - Shahrukh

I opened my eyes and saw the moon shining. We had a full moon, so the night of Mumbai shone in the light. The stars shone and looked like little diamonds. I closed my eyes again and saw his face smile. I could no longer control my feelings. He had told Karan that he would make the film. This should be our opportunity. We would present our feelings to the whole world and clarify everything. I wanted to show you a completely new world. A world in which nothing matters except our love. I already had everything planned. Of course, she would agree. It was a Karan film. I was so anxious about our time together. Far from the local world. For so many years, he had suppressed everything. I had just closed a lot, because I simply was not allowed to be. How could a Shahrukh Khan simply love in such a way? So pure and so easy. Only Kajol made me feel that way. She was my soul mate. And now everyone should know that. I wanted to shout it in all directions. Our time had arrived. I was determined to be wild.

Days after our meeting with Karan, I still had not heard from Kajol. Should it be a bad sign? Again and again I said no. I knew her. She had to read the entire script first. She imagined the scenes and felt every line, every emotion and every scene. Kajol was a person who never acted. She felt a film and made it authentic. I looked at my phone, but she had not answered. I could not stand it anymore and I called Karan. After a long timber, I heard a loud voice

»Ji«

»Karan, it's me. Tell me, have you heard anything about Kajol? Did she contact you? "I barely heard Karan. It was probably on the way, because there were loud noises from vehicles.

»Shahrukh, I'm in Deli. I cannot talk now. I'll call you later.« Karan finished the conversation. I left my phone on the table and stayed in the large window. Raindrops bounced against the large window and slid down the glass. "Kajol, where are you? Why do not you call?" I could not control my thoughts. Something in me told me something was wrong. I felt something that closed my throat, but I still did not know what it was.

When I left the office in the afternoon, Pooja approached me. She grimaced and her face reflected a sadness I did not know. Without saying a word, he turned his tablet over and I saw the big headline "CONFIRMED Kajol and Aamir in the new blockbuster Fanaa!" Again and again I repeated this phrase. That could not be. My heart could not accept what my eyes had read. Kajol could not make that film with Aamir. I did not scream and roared all over the house. In my anger, I grabbed the keys and ran to the car. I had to go to her now. I wanted to see it. She should explain that to me. I wanted to look her in the eye. I wanted to see it with my own eyes, when she lies to herself. Everyone tried to stop me but I separated from everyone. I did not want anyone with me. This was something I had to do on my own.

I took the car and ran. On the way I tried again and again to call Karan. But it only sounded. My anger increased and I was breathless. I hit the wheel hard yelling "No !!!" Why did Kajol do that? I ran through the streets and approached Kajol's house. I said to myself, "Shahrukh, keep calm, there is surely a simple explanation, surely this film will be filmed at another time or it will be done in parallel." The doors opened and I drove down the driveway. Without thinking, I went out and let my anger guide me. I slammed the car door and climbed the few steps. I did not need to call because it was already open.

»Namaste Mr. Khan« The kind housewife smiled at me. But I could not even answer. I just looked around and asked

»Where is Kajol?« Irritated by my tone, the girl looked at me. I intimidated her. But completely caught in my anger, I did not take any consideration and passed by her. I looked around the room and shouted out loud "Kajol" I turned around and heard footsteps nearby. I waited a moment and saw her. With wide eyes he approached me.

»Shahrukh? What's happening?« I shook briefly. As if, I could shake this pain. But it had not worked.

»Kajol ...« I took a deep breath and repeated.

»Kajol, how can you do this? Why are you making this film with Aamir? Kajol, you cannot utter it to me! "I finished my prayer because I felt my voice was becoming more and more fragile. I still was not allowed to show her my feelings. It was not allowed to happen in this way. She deserved it in another way. Not here and not today. Kajol did not answer my questions. She looked down and did not say a word. I took two steps toward her and took her by the hand.

»Kajol, please talk to me. Why did you do this? I just want to understand you.« Kajol looked up and looked at me. I recognized her sadness, but also something that I always admired about her. A force that was not comparable with anything.

»Shahrukh, I cannot make your film. I cannot leave my daughter for months alone. And I do not think it's right to get Nysa out of here and take her with me. Also, I do not like this film. How do you imagine that? Make a film in which we break two marriages to live a love. This does not comply with my principles. What do you think, what rumors would come? Shahrukh I cannot and I will not make this film. I am happily married and I love my husband« Kajol could not continue. Her tears flowed gently over her face and her voice sounded fragile and trembling. That was not my Kajol. I was speechless and did not understand. I lifted her chin and looked her straight in the eye. I did not see it. I did not see that brightness, the one that made it so special. It was not my Kajol. Without another word, I turned around and walked to the door. When I noticed Ajay. He put his hand on my shoulder and smiled at me.

»Well, Mr. Khan is sometimes lost in life. I am so proud of my wife that she is so strong in making such decisions.« I pulled his hand away from my shoulder and took a step toward him.

»Mr. Devgan does not miss a war because a battle is lost. You will never be the winner.« We stared into each other's eyes for a moment, and I could see all their hatred. But for the first time that day, I felt satisfaction. He was right. I had lost but I would not let it happen like that.

I left the house and the property. I went home, but I did not drive to our House. I parked the car and walked a few meters to the beach. I had to master my thoughts. I sat on the warm sand and looked at the sun, which was sinking behind the horizon. Kajol's words echoed in my head. I lit a cigarette and looked at my phone. I saw that Karan had called in the meantime. I dialled the redial and waited for the bell ...

»Shahrukh? By God where are you? You know?« Karan sounded excited and disappointed. He had not expected that either.

»Yes, I just got out of where she was. Karan she will not do it. Kajol loves me to much!« In the background I heard Karan swallow and fight with composure.

»Shahrukh ... what are we going to do now?« I looked up and said firmly.

»Karan, we will make this film. And we will have great success. But we have to change one thing!« Karan started to cough. As if I had swallowed, because he did not expect exactly this.

»Shahrukh, what do you want to change?« With pleasure, I sucked my cigarette and took out with satisfaction the smoke from the last corner of my lungs.

»Karan, I'm going to make this film with Rani by my side. And the scene that we eliminate ... we will shoot this scene in its entirety! «

"Every disappointment opens your eyes and closes the heart little by little more and more."

I hope you liked the update. I have to apologize for updating so little. But my health is not very good and I cannot write as I would like.

Moreover, I hope you like it.

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