Whenever you doubt how far you can go, remember how far you have come. Remember everything you've faced, all the battles you've won and all the fears you've overcome.
I believe that people are destined to each other and always find themselves sooner...
After the message to Kajol I felt liberated. I felt a very great relief. Of course, I still felt that pain, that infinite longing. But finally I could go on. I had to focus on my life. But never again would I allow someone to hurt me like that. I had opened my heart in a way I had never admitted.
From Kajol's point of view
The message of Shahrukh hadn't only burned in my heart. No, it had made my soul cry. He had shown me in a very cold and hard way that I couldn't live all my decisions. I had to change something. I had an age when I had to wonder when it was my turn as a strong and lonely woman ... I wanted to live and love. I not only wanted to do what others expected of me.
The days in Sofia passed quickly and everyday life in Mumbai returned. The first days I retired completely. I took the time to think clearly and find my new path. At every moment of the day I remembered the pain I felt in my heart for Shahrukh. I don't know how many times I picked up the phone and dialled his number. But I never had the courage to call him. What should I say? I couldn't. I had shattered the only person I loved from the bottom of my heart. I had taken away love and hope. A call from Ajay took me out of my thoughts. I shook and answered him.
»Yes?«
»Kajol I left the documents on the desk. Can you bring them to me please? I cannot get out of here.«
»Ajay, does it have to be now? I'll send you the driver, he can bring you.«
»No, no, Kajol are confidential documents, bring them to me now.« I couldn't answer him since Ajay had cut the call. I kept looking at the phone. I had no choice to take the documents to the studios.
From Shahrukh's point of view
Again and again we shot that damn scene. Again and again I got into that car. But I constantly lost my mission or jumped too fast. It's the same thing that didn't work. Something was wrong with me today. I couldn't concentrate. Again and again I heard that CUT CUT CUT. I got upset and turned to go to my dressing room. Everyone started to give me voices but I didn't care I needed a break. Slowly I lit a cigarette and pulled hard. With pleasure, I blew this cold smoke from my lungs. As if I wanted to remove all the evil that had accumulated during all this time in me. When I opened the door, my heart stopped ... I felt a pang ... short but painful. I knew that feeling. And only one person caused it ... I carefully turned my head and my eyes were tied in that place. Could it really be? How should I react now? I still felt so much pain. Space dropped me and I sat on the small staircase in front of my dressing room. Kajol hadn't seen me yet. She seemed relaxed and happy. As always, his voice was heard at a big distance. Kajol embraced everyone with affection and spoke with different people. With a smile that even enchanted his greatest enemy. Yes, that's how she was. A woman who carried her heart in her tongue and conquered the world with him. I noticed how my memory, my pain and my anger became longing. It doesn't matter what she had done. It doesn't matter why she did it. I loved her from the bottom of my heart. And I would always do that. But immediately I admonished, no, you cannot soften now. No, she had decided on her marriage ... At that moment, Ajay appeared and hugged Kajol. When Kajol looked over his shoulder, our eyes met. At that time, the world was completely lost. Our surroundings did not exist. There was no time or life. Only this moment when I could look up to his soul. A soul that was full of pain. This moment that couldn't be destroyed or manipulated by anything or anyone. She had not expected me and that is why this moment was so real and honest. Without taking my eyes off Kajol, she left the embrace and handed Ajay some documents. Ajay left the studios and Kajol kept his eyes on me. His eyes burned in my heart until a gentle smile crossed his beautiful face anticipating my reaction. But I couldn't react. I turned around and went into my dressing room.
From Kajol's point of view
I didn't expect to meet Shahrukh. I wasn't ready for this. But I was happy to have seen it. Immediately, I felt that love so deep and pure in my heart. I had missed him so much. Without thinking I wanted to run towards him ... but I could see his pain. He was pale and his eyes were free. Seeing it like that broke my heart. I suffered because I knew that I had damaged him in a way that I didn't have forgiveness. And I understood his reaction.
After he disappeared into his dressing room, I turned around sadly and left the studio. I had to give him the time he needed and hope that one day, his heart would forgive me.
From Shahrukh's point of view
His gaze didn't leave my thoughts. I closed my eyes and saw that soft smile, and the brightness in his eyes. How could a single person wake up so much in me? So much emotion that I couldn't handle. It was only a moment that I had completely deviated. I had planned so much. I wanted to be strong. I wanted to be myself again. But who was Shahrukh Khan without his Kajol? In front of the table I stop and with a single free wiggle the whole table and leave it empty. When the glasses fell to the ground, they tinkled and broke into a thousand pieces. Not even the pain of my bleeding hand covered the pain in my heart. Everything was so useless. I sank to the ground, pressing my knees against me. I just wanted to forget everything.
The high voice of my assistant ripped me from my deep black thoughts.
»Shahrukh, we have to continue ...« I looked at the door and yelled that today I wouldn't do anything else. I lowered my eyes and saw my hand again. Once more they knocked on the door. Furiously I screamed to be left alone. But nobody responded. I closed my eyes and put my face on my legs. I just wanted to forget. I didn't want to feel that pain anymore because I couldn't take it anymore. My eyes filled with tears, which I tried to repress. But even for that I couldn't anymore. My soul screamed and my body reacted. Suddenly I felt a soft touch of a hand on my head. Tenderly someone stroked my hair. Scared, I looked up and our eyes met ...
When someone cries, it doesn't mean that he gives up, only that he feels more than the heart can withstand ...
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