exo imagines {closed}

Rant #2 : Luhan

Please read this compilation of rants of mine. Do not correct any grammatical or spelling error as this is not an imagine of any sort. I may make other references to other artistes, scandals, and so on in addition to the said title. Thank you for your cooperation. More information about the continuation of the imagine series will be posted at the end of the rants. 

Today is the 10th day of the 10th month (of 2014). EXO has currently 10 members. 

Coincidence much? Perhaps.

One of the two reasons I got into EXO was a certain Chinese boy with tousled brown-black hair, doe eyes, and an adorable grin. I had barely entered the KPOP fandom (Super Junior, to be specific) but this boy? I'm not sure why myself, but I was drawn into the whirlwind of a fandom - the EXO fandom. By far, this is the roughest fandom I have seen, not including those fans that stay true to the band and don't ignite conflicts unnecessarily. 

Yet, why do I feel that I am somehow proud of this fandom? 

To all the future and new EXO-Ls, or EXOstans, whatever you prefer to call yourselves, please. The OT11 (or OT10 as it is today) you see now is a three hundred and sixty degree difference from the OT12 we so adored until May. 

Until Kris. As much as I hate to let him go, I dislike the fandom bashing him and each other even more. Please, please don't hate Kris for leaving. He has his reasons, please. Apparently, he has myocarditis, an infection of the heart, although I am not too sure about this. Time boils, but it does not heal. My wounds from Kris' departure are still raw, fresh and tender. Just as they were on the verge of healing, another member leaves. This time? My first bias.

Don't get me wrong, I love Kris just as much as the next EXO-L, but Luhan...he meant so much to me back in 2013. Luhan was my encouragement, my light, my everything last year, especially as it was the year for the major examinations. 

"Don't give up on your dreams and keep working towards it" - Luhan

I am sure Luhan did not let this sentence slip out accidentally. He said this back in 2012, when EXO were still rookies, fresh from the oven of debut. He meant it. He worked hard for, what, 2 more years? Look, just look how far EXO has come since rookie phase. Now, no one can call them the timid, shy rookies who couldn't even bow in sync when they first appeared on stage. No one. They've won two triple crowns with Wolf, and achieved all-kills with Overdose and Growl. 

 They have been working towards their dreams. And no one can stop them, not even the fans. 

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Do you all really think Luhan wants to leave, without any reason? Do you think he wants to leave his hyung Xiumin, all his dongsaengs, Sehun? Well, I would like you to rethink that statement.

"你的回忆连以后会充满我的足迹" - Chen, Don't Go

Whatever it is, EXO is only a foothold, a step, a portion of Luhan's career. There is still so much more in store for EXO, whether they are as 10, 11 or 12. However sometimes I still sit on my bed and wish for us to return back to MAMA era, when all the fandom had to worry about was when the next EXO comeback would be. 

Luhan is extremely proud of EXO. No words can ever describe how much he appreciates us fans. Don't you all remember back in 2013, when EXO won the Album of the Year during the Mnet Asian Music Awards? There was a brief group hug during the thanksgiving speeches, when all the other members hugged Suho, each other, covered his face, and were, to cut it short, all smiles and tears. Who is to say Luhan (without any intention) wants to leave this group of brothers, friends?

However, since young, our parents have told us about the difference between need and want. We need to drink water which is essential for our survival. We want that awesome new toy from the department store. We can also apply this to the current situation. Luhan does not want to leave EXO, but he needs to in order to obtain that great amount of rest and recuperation he so deserves. He may need to win that lawsuit in court to get that rest and recuperation, and eventually carry on with his individual activities in China but that does not necessarily mean he wants to. 

I've been listening to Don't Go and Angel (M versions) a lot these days, ever since the rumours about Luhan surfaced. Kris' departure was kind of different, it was unexpected and of course we were all unprepared for it. Though I still had that belief this could just be a mere figment of imagination, I started listening to M songs more, and I don't know whether to be happy or sad that I've been somehow prepared for this. 

With all the depression going on, I finally took a walk in the park yesterday night. Cliche, I know, but trust me on this, it helps. But the mention of the word 'park' already prompts me to think about Chanyeol, so eventually, my evening walk was clouded with disaster. 

I was already walking out the door. I was really considering leaving the fandom. Like, it's been so chaotic that the only good things that stay good are the fanfictions. Somehow, I started walking back. They say, once you Jongin, you can never Jongout. I've become too attached to the fandom that well, it's too hard to leave. Since July last year, I finally got to recognise every single member, know their names, and around September, I could identify their voices. In October, after a major examination, I started writing fanfiction, and I've never stopped since then. 

My journey in the EXO fandom hasn't come to a sharp halt with Luhan's departure. It's just a journey with more risks to take.

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"OT12 was the past, OT10 is the present, but I want all EXO-Ls to remember that there is a future" 

There is this 90-liner. He hails from Beijing. His voice, in my opinion, sounds like the melody of the soft buzz of a thousand fireflies. It's soothing, and it can convey emotion almost perfectly. He claims to be manly, but to me, his face is the total opposite. It defies age. His smile, it lights up the whole room, there simply isn't a soul who can stand in the same room and fail to notice it. When he smiles, it's genuine. He doesn't put on a facade, instead, he shows his warm, kind, loving self to fans. 

He failed the JYP auditions. He got casted for the SM auditions while he was shopping, and eventually got into one of Korea's most popular boybands. He participated in exactly 12 episodes of a reality show, where he captured the hearts of all the international fangirls. 

This boy, he looks good in blonde. But whether his hair colour is purple, pink, yellow or green, he's still the same person in my eyes. 

I call him Luhannie.

He was my first bias.

I now remember that it was never the History music video that made Luhan my first bias. It was, in actuality, a simple, ubiquitous fan-made video, that made me more interested in EXO as a whole. Though the music used in the video wasn't EXO's, well, it was the content that really started this love for EXO. So blame the maker of the video if you'd like for causing me to be such a crazy fangirl. 

(I'm sorry, but at first I didn't realise the music was 1D's)

EXO, Saranghaja!

Hello :) I'll be updating later, okay, if not tomorrow. Hehehehe. I'm sorry. I have a lot of Luhan requests and I'm afraid halfway through I'll just break down from writing about him >< 

(Psst! My birthday is next week, I'm getting a Wolf T-Shirt, yay ^^))

Youtube video (The Video That Caused Me to Like EXO) is attached.

~Edaline