EEEEMMMMMEEETTT! (Twilight Humour)

Let the games begin

Emmett's POV:

I knew EXACTLY what we are going to do today....now I just have to block my mind from Eddie boy while I can make my plan and gather my ninja-weapons....hehehehe...

"EMMETT!!!" Edward yelled. Damn it, Busted. "STOP LAUGHING LIKE A MANIAC! IT'S DRIVING ME NUTS!" Phew. No one knows....yet.

Bella's POV:

Well, yesterday was definitely interesting. After running from the principal, on Monday we can all certainly expect to be in major trouble. Oh well, I'm innocent at least. Can't say the same for Emmett...speaking of Emmett, what is he up to today? I thought as I walked on the front lawn of the Cullen mansion. Alice greeted me outside.

"Hi ya Bella!" she bounced happily. For a second I wondered what she would be like if she were on a sugar rush...but then I quickly pushed that thought out of my mind. I have had enough nightmares to last me a life time.

"Hey, Alice. What's going on?....has Emmett done anything stupid yet?" I asked, rolling my eyes at the mention of 'stupid' and 'Emmett'.

"Well, not much. And as for Emmett, he's actually been really go-" But Alice was interrupted as a computer screen that had been tossed out the window landed right in front of us. And then half of a table.

We stared at the table in silence, wondering what had just happened, and if we really wanted to know. Then, for the first time, in like, the HISTORY of the world, I heard Jasper:

*Rain Forest*

Random guy again: LOOK! a FLYING SQUIRREL!!....

Echo:

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEMMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"That was your guys' computer screen, wasn't it?" I asked Alice. She nodded and smiled. She smiled at any opportunity to shop, even if it's to replace things....

"Well, now that you're here, we can get started!" Alice chirped. Here we go again.

"With what, might I ask?" I squinted my eyes at her bouncing figure, suspiciously.

"It's a surprise. Emmett's ide-"

"NOOOOOOOOOOO WAYYYY!" I yelled before she could even come CLOSE to finishing that sentence.

"Bella, don't worry. It's nothing like THAT......like I was saying, it was Emmett's idea, and I had a vision....everything works out great, I saw it...well, I didn't see the OUTCOME, but nothing bad will happen. I don't want to cheat...." she babbled on. "But anyways, Emmett and I have been working really hard to keep our minds from Edward. Like I said, it's a surprise."

I hated when the words 'Emmett' and 'Surprise' are used in the same sentence. It's usually stands for disaster. As we walked in the door, Edward was behind me in an instant, "Hello, love" he said, his lips to my ear, his arms around my waste. I turned around to meet his lips. He kissed me passionately, His cool lips against mine. But he pulled away all-too-quick as Emmett came running down the stairs, and scooped me into a giant hug.

"EMMETT!....can't....BREATHE!" I gasped.

"It would be pretty idiotic to kill her in a hug, since Edward has put so much work in keeping her alive. But imagine the headlines: Bella Swan, 18, Killed by boyfriend's brother giving her a hug." Rosalie said, laughing. Emmett boomed with laughter as he let go of me. Edward laughed, too.

"Well, Alice, Emmett, we are all here, what is it you are going to have us do?"Edward asked, impatiently.

"We are having aaa.......murder mystery party!" Alice sang, jumping up and down on Emmett's shoulders. Well, this won't be too bad. I always loved mysteries. This might actually be fun, as long as no one cheats....

"Wait, Alice, how do you plan on doing this? With Edward reading minds, and you seeing the future...."

"I have carefully refrained from seeing part of THAT future. Edward, on the other hand....well let's just say that he won't be able to figure it out...." that made no sense, whatsoever. I gave her a quizzical look, but she just waved it off with her hand.

She whipped out a bunch of pieces of paper. She handed one to each of us, "Here are your parts, do not say them yet. Each of you will get dressed in the outfits I have picked out for you-" I cut her off with a loud "AARRGGHH!". She gave me an evil smile, "All of your clothes are on your beds. I trust you to wear them CORRECTLY-" She eyed Emmett, who was grinning like a mad man. "-Come on, Bella, clearly I will need to help you." She said as she grabbed my arm and pulled me up the stairs into her huge bathroom. She applied my makeup, then fixed my hair in large, spiral curls. She gave me a beautiful white dress to wear, that flowed down to my feet. I actually loved it, and the make-over. She could tell, because her smile was completely smug.

"I know, I know....I'm amazing." She said as she opened the door.

"Totally." I agreed as we walked downstairs. The sight I saw was hilarious.

Everyone was dressed in old day clothes, a look that fit them well, but just that I wasn't use too. Well, they had to wear these clothes one decade, right? I saw Edward and laughed. He looked like a total gentlemen, in his fancy clothes. Emmett came down with a camera. He snapped a ton of shots at Edward.

"I am going to murder you, Emmett," Edward said. Emmett doesn't stop taking pictures, and when Edward lunges at him, he tossed the camera to Alice.

"You know" she says conversationally, " I think Bella should be the one to hold on to this." She says as she tosses the camera to me. I smiled wickedly. Edward wouldn't dare attack me.

He turns to me, his beautiful golden eyes smoldering, "Give me the camera, Bella," he whispers in my ear. I felt my resolve weaken, but I really wanted to see these pictures developed, I quickly devised a full-proof plan.

I shoved the camera down the bodice of my dress. Edward's eyes about popped out of his head in shock. We all know he's not going in there.

Carlisle walks in, looks at me with a camera-shaped lump in my dress, and walks off muttering, "I don't want to know."

Everybody fell into chairs in hysterics. "Sorry, Edward, I just really want to see these pictures." I said once we calmed down, with the help of Jasper of course.

"Ok, whoever wins gets FULL CONTROL for a week. Of everything. No ifs, ands, or buts."

"I'm so going to win this thing," I said. I have been to one of these things before, and I'm really good at solving mysteries.

"Oh, I don't think so, sweetheart," Edward turned to me, "Solving mysteries was born in my blood."

"Yea, which you no longer have..." I replied, smug.

"OOOOOOOOOHHH!!" everyone said, laughing. This was funny, Edward and I have never been competitive about anything before.

"You'll see, princess," he replied, whispering, his lips to my ear, "Try not to get too distracted." He chuckled, a musical sound in my ear. I froze under his touch. Damn, he was right. Well, I just had to stay away from him during this.

"You're on, Mr. Perfect."

Let the games begin.