Falling for you

Chapter 25

Maybe it was because she was hurt.Maybe it was because she lost all faith in herself that she found herself sitting in the dark corner,knees pressed to her chest and arms wrapped around herself,brown hair in a disarray mop on her head and streaks of tears trailing down her cheeks,both old and new,making path after path as those pearls dropped onto the already damp cloth of her shirt.She choked on her saliva as she stared at the floor,tears breaking out once more.

She'd already shed so much tears.For what?All because she felt broken.More broken than she already was.After being discharged from the hospital,she had returned home knowing fully well the members were at Pledis for practice.And all she'd done since then was cry.It seemed to be her way of escape for those few days in the hospital and the few hours she'd been cooped up in her room in the darkest corner.To cry her heart out.

The tears she shed were her way of releasing the pain that hammered at her heart every moment.She tilted her head up and closed her eyes,hugging herself tighter,bearing the pain that spread through her arms the harder she pressed.But what was that pain compared to the pain that ached from her heart?

Was she just simply not enough?Was she that much of a burden to the world that others have to get hurt emotionally and physically before she realizes that she's just a burden to those around her?That she wasn't needed.That she was just a minor imperfection in the world.She was a nobody.A girl born to bring sadness to those around her.

It reminded her of her childhood friend in Daegu and Yoongi.Their friendship was unbreakable.They were always stuck at the hip.She knew her best friend had fallen in love with the boy and yet,because of her rapidly growing feelings for the boy,the moment he's asked for her heart,she willingly gave it,hurting both herself and her friend in the process.

She fumbled for her phone beside her,the bright illuminated screen hurting her eyes momentarily.She stared at the words and numbers on the phone then turned it off,staring once more at the hard,cold floor of her room.Her stomach growled but she payed no attention.She didn't care anymore.She was sure that at this point in her life,if she just simply disappeared,everyone would be happy.That everyone would rejoice at her vanishment.That they'd be thankful to finally have gotten rid of her.

Trouble was all she brought with her wasn't it?

You only bring trouble to those around you,Hyejin.It'd be best if you died.

She clamped her eyes shut,cupping her ears.

"No..."she whimpered,her breathing turning rapid.

But it's true.Face it,Hyejin.No one loves you.No one ever will.

She opened her eyes,tears pouring as she stared at the dark corner across from her.

"Mom,please...stop."she begged softly,looking at the figure of her mother that glared at her through the shadows.

You're nothing,Hyejin.You're the reason why I'm dead.You're the reason why your father is dead.

"No..."she cried.

It was true.Her father had died the day prior and it was just another arrow to the heart.To put it simply,everyone she loved was leaving and would soon leave her.All if which justified her point of being an unlucky soul to herself and those around her.

Her father was the only thing alongside Wonwoo that was left of her sanity.They were the last parts of the anchor than kept her on the ground.Now that both of them were gone,she realized there was no reason left to say.

Her willingness to stay faded away when her father died.It faded away when she saw the broken trust and betrayal in Wonwoo's eyes.That all faded when she realized that everything was her fault.