marvel one-shots

kind of a goodbye wish in ink // ironstrange

takes place: post-(alternate)Endgame (Tony didn't die, Morgan wasn't born, Pepper and Tony aren't together, everyone is back, Thanos was defeated)
tw: suicide, graphic imagery
word count: 1318

Scratching softly as Tony wrote, the pen spilled ink over the paper. Words he'd never send fill it, but he wrote anyways.

He thought it was kind of like a goodbye wish.

     As you'll never read this, I wish you would have kissed me. I wish you would have held me close and whispered sweet words into my ear with your ridiculously smooth voice. I wish you would have been less stubborn, I am certainly not one to talk though. I wish I could see you one last time. I wish this wasn't what I wanted. I wish things could've have been different. I wish you could have been mine. I wish I could have been yours.

     The letter was addressed to a certain red-cloaked sorcerer, even though Tony didn't plan on having the letter found. Somewhere deep inside of Tony he wished that someone would find the blue-ink filled paper. A small part of him wished it would be Stephen directly, but that would require a miracle, and Tony was all out of those.

     Come sunrise tomorrow some unlucky person would find his body, broken to bits and blood soaked, out on the cold concrete. He had planned it, pictured it. He drew it, too. He drew himself, from a bird's eye view, laying in a puddle of his own blood. His arms and legs twisted at angles that they shouldn't be, his neck in a somewhat similar state. His cold, blank eyes staring up at nothing.

     It was an intricately detailed drawing. That was Tony's secret talent: he could draw. Really good. Nobody knew though. He had always thought, "well, they never asked."

He would try to land exactly how he looked in the drawing, though he knew he didn't have much control over how he would look when he was dead. He decided that he was going to tape the drawing on the outside of his bedroom door so that anyone who passed in the hallway could see it.

He had written everyone a letter. He planned to hide the multiple letters he had written to Stephen all together in one envelope. Someone would find it eventually if they were smart enough.

Tony thought that maybe Stephen would wonder why he didn't have an envelope like the rest of them had. Tony hoped that Stephen wondered why there wasn't an envelope amongst the others. Why there wasn't one that said, "Dr. Master of the Mystic Arts," between the ones that said, "Jackass That Stole My Suit And Called It War Machine," and, "Underoos."

When Tony was done with the letter, he folded it and tucked it neatly into the envelope titled, "My Dearest, Stephen Strange." He was going to put the location of the envelope in his glasses, which he planned on leaving for Peter, and then let the boy figure it out.

He labeled the rest of the envelopes.

"Underoos," for Peter.

"Platypus," after thinking about all the inside jokes that he and Rhodey shared.

"Science Bro," for Bruce, or Professor Hulk, as he called himself now.

"Kid," for Harley, who he hadn't seen in years, but he put the kid's home address on the envelope. He could only hope someone would send it.

"Point Break," for Thor, even though he had gone off with the Guardians, he had a feeling he'd visit.

"Capsicle," for Steve.