marvel one-shots

damn it, wade // spideypool

tw: none
word count: 852

It was Friday night, which meant Peter had night patrol. It wasn't really patrol so much as pick a spot and watch for trouble. It was like a steak-out except there wasn't really anything you were looking out for. Of course if there was trouble he took care of it, but nights were usually calm.

Peter stood atop a tall apartment building, holding the straps of his backpack like a nervous schoolgirl.

"Where are you, Wade?" He mumbled, searching the streets below for the familiar black and red suit.

"Behind you, Spider-babe." A voice snickered from behind him.

Peter jumped, then spun around, pivoting on his heel. Sure enough, there the leather clad man stood, Hello Kitty backpack straps loose around his shoulders.

"Damn it, Wade! You scared the crap out of me!" Peter yelled at the man, the lenses on his mask widening.

"Sorry, Peteypie. I got caught up in something." Wade chuckled and swung the backpack off his shoulders, dropping it to the roof with a rather quite thunk.

"Oh, oh! What did you bring this time?" Peter asked excitedly, jumping up and down.

"Monopoly. Now chill out, you're going to give our chips a concussion." Wade snickered, sitting and zipping open the backpack. Peter sat down across from Wade, unzipping his backpack and pulling out two large bags of Doritos and a blanket.

"One nacho cheese and one spicy sweet chili." Peter smiled, setting the bags down next to them. "This is going to be lit."

     "Lit? Sorry, I didn't bring a lighter. Was I supposed to? Author, quick! Write me in with a lighter!" Wade yelled up at the sky.

     Author? What the hell, Wade? Peter thought. He wrapped the blanket around himself.

     "What? No. Don't be stupid, just get the game out." Peter giggled at Wade's stupidity.

"Awe, Spider-babe called me stupid." Wade cooed as he pulled the board game from his backpack and began to set it up. Peter knew the man was smirking under his mask.

"Mhm." Peter hummed while he lifted his mask up to his nose and opened the bag of nacho cheese Doritos.

"I call the car!" Wade yelled childishly, grabbing the silver piece before lifting his mask and taking a few chips from the bag.

"Fine. I'll take the dog then." Peter giggled and grabbed the dog piece. They discarded the unneeded game pieces into the box. "You're new name is Peter Jr." The boy smiled at the piece.

"Talking to game pieces, Peteypie?" Wade teased.

"Oh, please." Peter playfully rolled his eyes as he counted out fake money to Wade and himself.

Peter was always the banker and Wade was always in jail, that's how they played. Even when Wade made up his own rules he still couldn't beat Peter. Peter was the king of board games.

"Thank you, kind banker sir." Wade teased, collecting his money into a neat stack.

"Whatever." Peter laughed.

"Want to see something cool? Oh hell, of course you do." Wade asked then answered his own question. He threw the money into the air and spread out his arms as it fell on him.

"This is the closest I'll ever get to a money bath." Wade whispered, feigning sadness.

"Cut the crap, Wilson. Pick up your money and take your turn. I will not lose my win streak because you're broke." Peter teased.

     Wade huffed and picked up the colorful money.

     "First one in jail has to take the first patrol round." Wade smirked, offering Peter his hand.

     "Deal." Peter took Wade's hand and shook.

     Ten minutes later, Wade was surprised. Peter had ended up stuck in jail first.

     "Damn it, Wade!" Peter screeched.

     "That wasn't my fault! And come on, Spider-babe. We shook on it." Wade smirked and Peter pulled his mask down.

     "Fine, I'll be back soon." Peter started, he was about to shoot a web at the building across the street, but was stopped by Wade.

     "No, no, no. I don't think you understand. I said come on. We're going together." Wade had covered their game with the blanket Peter had wrapped around himself earlier.

     "But you don't have webs." Peter stated bluntly.

     "Nope, but you do." Wade smiled.

     The lenses on Peter's suit widened, "you are so lame." He mumbled, then turned so Wade could climb on his back.

     "Thanks, Peteypie." Wade cooed to the boy.

     "Hold on tight, we're going quick." Peter mumbled to Wade as he swung from building to building.

     When the night was over Peter had won their game of Monopoly and they had stopped three muggings. Peter had, purposely, dropped Wade a total of two times and Wade had shot four people, all of them were muggers. An overall successful night.

     Peter yawned Wade grinned. The sun was rising and Wade was packing up the board game as Peter folded the blanket.

     "Sleep well, Spider-babe. Tonight was nice. I'll see you later." Wade cooed to the boy as he swung away, backpack on his shoulders and his eyes just barely able to stay open.

     "Bye, Wade!" Peter called over his shoulder.